A simple yet clear example of how Israel constantly violates what the international community is based on: International law.<
http://www.voicesforpalestine.com/index.cfm?pagepath=International_Law&id=10416
Pictures taken by the bloggers in Gaza
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Friday, January 30, 2009
Natalie Abou Shakra: Shame on BBC
Thursday January 29, 2009
I realize I have lost myself. I have lost myself in the faces, the stories, the lives, the suffering, the nervousness, the tension, the anger. I have lost myself in a whirlwind of emotions, in a whirlwind of bombings and shelling, in a whirlwind of snipers, in a whirlwind of gunboats, blood, and shootings, of tanks and ambulances, in a whirlwind of demands and questions, of clarifications and responses, of questions with answers that are questions without answers…
The demonstration against the entry of the BBC reporters began at eleven thirty in the morning. Dr. As'ad and I arrive to see Haidar Eid who I have missed dearly after not being able to see him for some days. I miss his light sense of humour, his hilarious impersonation of Dr. As'ad, his smile, his lousy attire, his shaggy hair, his discordant laugh, his radical attitude, his quick eye movements, his hazel eyes… Adel comes along, and I confide in him my rising fears of leaving Gaza without return. Comrade Cueeva, after arriving, tells me I can always get in via the 'special entries' [of which I cannot elaborate on at the moment], with special coordination from within, now that I have 'connections' herein. Nevertheless, I am not reassured.
Kamal distributes flyers with "BOYCOTT BBC" on them. Comrades Ewa and Cueeva stand by my side at the front as Kamal begins speech talking about the absurdity and the 'beginning' of this all when Belfour gave his promise in 1917. Ewa followed in English speaking as a British citizen, against the British Broadcasting Company, followed by Dr. As'ad and then Mustafa Barghouti who gave a speech [which I did not like]. He condemned the actions of the BBC, but never mentioned the 'boycotting' of it, missing the point of the whole event. At the end of his speech, M. Barghouti talked with the BBC! Haidar noticed and screamed from where we were: Boycott BBC! Shame on BBC! Out BBC!
The whole point is that these reporters that got in were with the Israeli occupation forces' tanks as they bombed the children of Gaza. The BBC also refused to screen a charity call for humanitarian aid to Gaza that the Disasters Emergency Committee (DEC) was caling for. In the Alsafeer Economic Newspaper, Peter Chonka writes in his article "Thousands Protest BBC 'Impartiality' on Gaza" on the 25th of January, 2009 that the fact that the "casualties of the conflict have fallen overwhelmingly on one side- the Palestinian Gazan side at a ration of around 100 to 1- is seemingly irrelevant in this question of impartiality."
After the demonstration, Naser came by and told me he wants me in his National Arab Forum group. I usually define my attitude, with particular scrutiny towards identity politics as "an Arab Woman from Lebanon," or as, according to a line Mahmoud Darwish wrote in his Wada'aan Ayyatuha el Harb, Wada'aan Ayyuha Essalam [Goodbye to War, Goodbye to Peace] first published in 1973 in Beirut, of which he says "I do not belong to a country, I belong to a revolution" [ana la antami ila watan, ana antami ila thawra]. As a leftist, anarchist [yes, leftist and anarchist can exist together], feminist, secularist [with on extra A that I do not wish to mention herein, now at least], I prefer my identity to be closely affiliated with the second statement. But, my first is what I have been usually using within the Arab and Western media… especially to the Western media of which presume… presume many things, and in an extremely Orientalist approach.
I leave with Adel and Haidar, and comrades from the Internaitonal Solidarity Movement leave to Beit Hanoun. I later followed to Beit Hanoun to do my private visit there to a very special family…
Haidar, Adel and I had some coffee at Delices café, where we discussed Mustafa Barghouti's attitude: he was speaking to the BBC in a demonstration where the whole idea and action was to BOYCOTT BBC!
It is necessary that one boycotts radically… how else will there be change? How else will effect be transitional? We are in need of a radical transition: transition of world power, transition of narrations, transition of attitudes, and transition of ways of action…
Many of the ISM members were hesitant about boycotting of the BBC, and some were embarrassed by the issue of incapability of boycotting since they usually speak out through this corporation to the world. Haidar and I agree that the need to be radical during such times is necessary.
..to be continued
I realize I have lost myself. I have lost myself in the faces, the stories, the lives, the suffering, the nervousness, the tension, the anger. I have lost myself in a whirlwind of emotions, in a whirlwind of bombings and shelling, in a whirlwind of snipers, in a whirlwind of gunboats, blood, and shootings, of tanks and ambulances, in a whirlwind of demands and questions, of clarifications and responses, of questions with answers that are questions without answers…
The demonstration against the entry of the BBC reporters began at eleven thirty in the morning. Dr. As'ad and I arrive to see Haidar Eid who I have missed dearly after not being able to see him for some days. I miss his light sense of humour, his hilarious impersonation of Dr. As'ad, his smile, his lousy attire, his shaggy hair, his discordant laugh, his radical attitude, his quick eye movements, his hazel eyes… Adel comes along, and I confide in him my rising fears of leaving Gaza without return. Comrade Cueeva, after arriving, tells me I can always get in via the 'special entries' [of which I cannot elaborate on at the moment], with special coordination from within, now that I have 'connections' herein. Nevertheless, I am not reassured.
Kamal distributes flyers with "BOYCOTT BBC" on them. Comrades Ewa and Cueeva stand by my side at the front as Kamal begins speech talking about the absurdity and the 'beginning' of this all when Belfour gave his promise in 1917. Ewa followed in English speaking as a British citizen, against the British Broadcasting Company, followed by Dr. As'ad and then Mustafa Barghouti who gave a speech [which I did not like]. He condemned the actions of the BBC, but never mentioned the 'boycotting' of it, missing the point of the whole event. At the end of his speech, M. Barghouti talked with the BBC! Haidar noticed and screamed from where we were: Boycott BBC! Shame on BBC! Out BBC!
The whole point is that these reporters that got in were with the Israeli occupation forces' tanks as they bombed the children of Gaza. The BBC also refused to screen a charity call for humanitarian aid to Gaza that the Disasters Emergency Committee (DEC) was caling for. In the Alsafeer Economic Newspaper, Peter Chonka writes in his article "Thousands Protest BBC 'Impartiality' on Gaza" on the 25th of January, 2009 that the fact that the "casualties of the conflict have fallen overwhelmingly on one side- the Palestinian Gazan side at a ration of around 100 to 1- is seemingly irrelevant in this question of impartiality."
After the demonstration, Naser came by and told me he wants me in his National Arab Forum group. I usually define my attitude, with particular scrutiny towards identity politics as "an Arab Woman from Lebanon," or as, according to a line Mahmoud Darwish wrote in his Wada'aan Ayyatuha el Harb, Wada'aan Ayyuha Essalam [Goodbye to War, Goodbye to Peace] first published in 1973 in Beirut, of which he says "I do not belong to a country, I belong to a revolution" [ana la antami ila watan, ana antami ila thawra]. As a leftist, anarchist [yes, leftist and anarchist can exist together], feminist, secularist [with on extra A that I do not wish to mention herein, now at least], I prefer my identity to be closely affiliated with the second statement. But, my first is what I have been usually using within the Arab and Western media… especially to the Western media of which presume… presume many things, and in an extremely Orientalist approach.
I leave with Adel and Haidar, and comrades from the Internaitonal Solidarity Movement leave to Beit Hanoun. I later followed to Beit Hanoun to do my private visit there to a very special family…
Haidar, Adel and I had some coffee at Delices café, where we discussed Mustafa Barghouti's attitude: he was speaking to the BBC in a demonstration where the whole idea and action was to BOYCOTT BBC!
It is necessary that one boycotts radically… how else will there be change? How else will effect be transitional? We are in need of a radical transition: transition of world power, transition of narrations, transition of attitudes, and transition of ways of action…
Many of the ISM members were hesitant about boycotting of the BBC, and some were embarrassed by the issue of incapability of boycotting since they usually speak out through this corporation to the world. Haidar and I agree that the need to be radical during such times is necessary.
..to be continued
Gaza Strip academics, journalists: BBC out of Gaza
Gaza Strip academics, journalists: BBC out of Gaza
(Ma`an News Service)
Gaza – Ma’an – Palestinian academics and media personnel, as well as international activists, demanded the British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) leave the Gaza Strip over its refusal to air an appeal for aid on the network.
Academics organized a sit-in near the entrance to the BBC’s office in Gaza, accusing it of bias toward Israel and “its crimes,” as well as denouncing its stance on rejecting to publish an appeal for humanitarian aid for the Gaza Strip on its satellite channel.
The BBC said it would not play the appeal due to its policies on neutrality.
Protesters demanded that BBC reporters Paul Wallet, Andrew Herill and Paul Martin leave Gaza immediately, threatening to “use the shoes of those killed on them” if they remain in the Strip.
Other demonstrators chanted slogans against the BBC’s administration, including General Manager Mark Thompson, accusing him of lying and carrying banners reading, “BBC out of Gaza,” “Boycott BBC” and “BBC: Biased toward Israel and complicit in Israeli war crimes.”
British activist Ewa Jasiewicz called for her country to stop supporting Israel, end investment within its borders and boycott Israeli products. She added that many other members of Palestinian solidarity organizations “were eyewitnesses to Israeli crimes in Gaza.”
As’ad Abu Sharkh, a university professor in Gaza, said, “The BBC has become a partner to Israel in its war on Gaza.”
He insisted the BBC should equally refuse to air threats to “turn Gaza into a larger holocaust more grotesque than that of the Jews,” a reference to Israeli Deputy Defense Minister Matan Vilnai’s statements during the three-week assault, “while refusing to air an appeal on behalf of the very victims of that holocaust.”
(Ma`an News Service)
Gaza – Ma’an – Palestinian academics and media personnel, as well as international activists, demanded the British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) leave the Gaza Strip over its refusal to air an appeal for aid on the network.
Academics organized a sit-in near the entrance to the BBC’s office in Gaza, accusing it of bias toward Israel and “its crimes,” as well as denouncing its stance on rejecting to publish an appeal for humanitarian aid for the Gaza Strip on its satellite channel.
The BBC said it would not play the appeal due to its policies on neutrality.
Protesters demanded that BBC reporters Paul Wallet, Andrew Herill and Paul Martin leave Gaza immediately, threatening to “use the shoes of those killed on them” if they remain in the Strip.
Other demonstrators chanted slogans against the BBC’s administration, including General Manager Mark Thompson, accusing him of lying and carrying banners reading, “BBC out of Gaza,” “Boycott BBC” and “BBC: Biased toward Israel and complicit in Israeli war crimes.”
British activist Ewa Jasiewicz called for her country to stop supporting Israel, end investment within its borders and boycott Israeli products. She added that many other members of Palestinian solidarity organizations “were eyewitnesses to Israeli crimes in Gaza.”
As’ad Abu Sharkh, a university professor in Gaza, said, “The BBC has become a partner to Israel in its war on Gaza.”
He insisted the BBC should equally refuse to air threats to “turn Gaza into a larger holocaust more grotesque than that of the Jews,” a reference to Israeli Deputy Defense Minister Matan Vilnai’s statements during the three-week assault, “while refusing to air an appeal on behalf of the very victims of that holocaust.”
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Rally in Gaza against BBC office!
At 11:00 a.m. tomorrow morning 29 January 2009), journalists, media reporters, human rights activists and others will rally in front of Shawa and Housay tower in Gaza, a high building which houses many media offices, to proetst against BBC and kick it off Gaza city! Rally is in reaction to BBC's recent stance and policies regarding the Israeli war against Gaza!
Prof. Abdelwahed
Department of English
Faculty of Arts & Humanities
Al-Azhar University of Gaza
So ... people are homeless, hungry and in hospitals all around Gaza. Asking for humanitarian help for them is..."biased" ? So much for bloody objectivity! What shame.
Fisherman videos - Gaza
Dear all,
These are some footage comrades George from Greece, Andrew from Scotland and I took of the shootings yesterday and today of the fishermen's boats. One of the fishermen, Alaa el Habil, from the Shati' camp, was wounded in the leg before yesterday, and a boat arrived to the port of Gaza yesterday as we were there, of which was targeted by the Israelis...
The fishermen were given a limit of 20miles before the Oslo accprds, then it diminshed to 12, then 6 miles during the siege, then 3 miles now... it is impossible to catch good fish, a variety, and a good quantity within such a limit.This is especially devastating for the fishermen whose lives depend on fishing... whose families cannot survive without an income from this.
PS: mistake as to the date of one of the videos as it says 2008 rather than 2009...
Alaa Al-Habil - 27th Jan
https://rcpt.yousendit.com/646538738/3514c85935859196cca6c52b6e8b3172
Fishing boat attacked - 27th Janhttps://rcpt.yousendit.com/646598912/473a03dd2b7000148aff4e90827ed658
Natalie Abou Shakra
These are some footage comrades George from Greece, Andrew from Scotland and I took of the shootings yesterday and today of the fishermen's boats. One of the fishermen, Alaa el Habil, from the Shati' camp, was wounded in the leg before yesterday, and a boat arrived to the port of Gaza yesterday as we were there, of which was targeted by the Israelis...
The fishermen were given a limit of 20miles before the Oslo accprds, then it diminshed to 12, then 6 miles during the siege, then 3 miles now... it is impossible to catch good fish, a variety, and a good quantity within such a limit.This is especially devastating for the fishermen whose lives depend on fishing... whose families cannot survive without an income from this.
PS: mistake as to the date of one of the videos as it says 2008 rather than 2009...
Alaa Al-Habil - 27th Jan
https://rcpt.yousendit.com/646538738/3514c85935859196cca6c52b6e8b3172
Fishing boat attacked - 27th Janhttps://rcpt.yousendit.com/646598912/473a03dd2b7000148aff4e90827ed658
Natalie Abou Shakra
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Prof. Dr. Said Abdelwahed: Bereaved and traumaized Palestinian children in Gaza
Bereaved and traumatized Palestinian children need psychotherapists and special care!
Who will take care of them?
I just wonder!
The local psychotherapy organizations cannot do it for more than one reason. This is not the right place to discuss those reasons actually. Children still have bad memories; they still tell about ugly nights, nightmares and bad dreams. It looks like an ongoing show of miseries, untold stories, stress and depression! In the middle of that, the day before yesterday renewed momories from bad days when it was rumored that PFLP launched two rockets at Israel and the Israelis will hit back. Many governmental buildings including the main post office, and many schools in Gaza city were evacuated immediately! Pupiles ran out of their schools knowning not where to go as their school buses were not available; it was not the time to leave school! Many foreign media reporters left Gaza immediately for fear of any new consequences or complications! Yesterday, an American made F16 bomber-fighter flew overheads, then in a false rid, it broke the sound barrier causing a terrible sound! It scared everyone in the city as we thought it a blast somewhere! The Israeli are stil keeping up with the horror scene regardless of everything else! Then, the world community talks seriously about arms smuggling to Gaza! What kind of arms is being smuggled into Gaza. The invasion proved practically speaking that the Palestnians do not have weapons that can annoy the Israeli aricrafts and helicopters of any kind. They flew and raided without any anti-aricraft fire against it! Their tanks guarded their military army buldlozers that destroyed 60% of the green fields in Gaza, and it protected it when demolished Palestinian homes in Ezbet Abedrabo in Jabalia and Atatra to the far north of Gaza city! Those foregin meida reporters who arrived at the scene could not beleive their eyes as the whole geography of the place has totally changes. Even the psychology of the people has totally changed. It was like an earthquake hit that place, and what? It was all civilian homes! Thousands have turned to be displaced living either in UNRWA schools or stiking with their extended families elswehere away from their what used to be their homes! The fact of the matter is that words stand short from describing what it looks like now! It was more horrible than the Holocaust! I did not know before that 450 infant and child were Hamas affiliates or supporters!
Prof. Abdelwahed
Department of English
Faculty of Arts & Humanities
Al-Azhar University of Gaza
Who will take care of them?
I just wonder!
The local psychotherapy organizations cannot do it for more than one reason. This is not the right place to discuss those reasons actually. Children still have bad memories; they still tell about ugly nights, nightmares and bad dreams. It looks like an ongoing show of miseries, untold stories, stress and depression! In the middle of that, the day before yesterday renewed momories from bad days when it was rumored that PFLP launched two rockets at Israel and the Israelis will hit back. Many governmental buildings including the main post office, and many schools in Gaza city were evacuated immediately! Pupiles ran out of their schools knowning not where to go as their school buses were not available; it was not the time to leave school! Many foreign media reporters left Gaza immediately for fear of any new consequences or complications! Yesterday, an American made F16 bomber-fighter flew overheads, then in a false rid, it broke the sound barrier causing a terrible sound! It scared everyone in the city as we thought it a blast somewhere! The Israeli are stil keeping up with the horror scene regardless of everything else! Then, the world community talks seriously about arms smuggling to Gaza! What kind of arms is being smuggled into Gaza. The invasion proved practically speaking that the Palestnians do not have weapons that can annoy the Israeli aricrafts and helicopters of any kind. They flew and raided without any anti-aricraft fire against it! Their tanks guarded their military army buldlozers that destroyed 60% of the green fields in Gaza, and it protected it when demolished Palestinian homes in Ezbet Abedrabo in Jabalia and Atatra to the far north of Gaza city! Those foregin meida reporters who arrived at the scene could not beleive their eyes as the whole geography of the place has totally changes. Even the psychology of the people has totally changed. It was like an earthquake hit that place, and what? It was all civilian homes! Thousands have turned to be displaced living either in UNRWA schools or stiking with their extended families elswehere away from their what used to be their homes! The fact of the matter is that words stand short from describing what it looks like now! It was more horrible than the Holocaust! I did not know before that 450 infant and child were Hamas affiliates or supporters!
Prof. Abdelwahed
Department of English
Faculty of Arts & Humanities
Al-Azhar University of Gaza
Monday, January 26, 2009
Petition for justice: Creation of a Special Tribunal to try Israeli War Criminals
Creation of a Special Tribunal to try Israeli War Criminals
http://www.petitiononline.com/EAFORD09/petition.html
Dear all,
We would appreciate it if you could sign this petition. It calls for nothing but justice. If war criminals will not be faced with justice, they can as well repeat their crimes over and over again.
Spread the word.
Thank you.
Moments of Gaza Team
http://www.petitiononline.com/EAFORD09/petition.html
Dear all,
We would appreciate it if you could sign this petition. It calls for nothing but justice. If war criminals will not be faced with justice, they can as well repeat their crimes over and over again.
Spread the word.
Thank you.
Moments of Gaza Team
Natalie Abou Shakra: Becoming a true Gazzawi
Tuesday January 20, 2009
An ISM gathering took place at my place… I came in late, oversleeping at the office. I ran through the streets like a crazy woman, trying to find a taxi to take me to Tal el Hawa… Fida had called to say the time has changed from 11 to 10am. I came in, Sitt Wafaa, smiling, knowing it is I who is knocking, opened the door to a Natalie with shaggy hair, smudged eyes with kohl, puffed eyelids, untidy clothes… I hugged her and ran to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face. I waved to Haidar, Jenny and George who were already laughing to the scene… Haidar greeted me with… "Fagadan!" [still remember what that means? Fagadan is, in Gazawwi dialect, a state of madness… with humorous implications]
"You have become a true Gazzawi!" he said…
We are thinking of making a board of the ISM in Gaza… and we are thinking of the University Teachers Association to make up this board…
We all go to the University Teachers Association house [it is a house, with offices there for the university professors], Jenny, Fida and Leila in Haidar's car, and George and I in Dr. As'ad's dark green one… I speak with George in the modest Greek that I know…
The University Teacher's Association offices got bombed… the professors issued a statement against the Israeli Occupation Forces' aggression that same night… this same group of professors are also part of the "one-state" group that call for a one state solution for all its citizens in Palestine, disregarding race, colour, gender, and ethnicity…
Despite the grief, despite the destruction, we laugh and joke… Haidar does his impersonation of Dr. As'ad which is hilarious…. He depicts Dr. As'ad as he speaks to the media on TV… and we all laugh…
I see that three missiles were launched, two of which strike the building, and one the neighbour's home. I notice it to be an Apache bombing because there was no burning aftermath… the war expert analyses again.
"We are stronger, we shall stay, we shall return…" words on a flyer nearby
"Why do you think they targeted us?!" Kamal demands…
Dr. As'ad says that they had a donkey tied to one of the trees… here you have the answer why! [again, donkeys, chicken, Kousa, pigeon's nests, Mickey Mouse Lunchboxes are targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces… oh, and children with Pink Pajamas!]
Of course, the donkey was slaughtered [can you also pass this on to PETA to take action?]
This place is the first place I came to before I went to Dr. As'ad's home… it was at the University Teacher's Association that I was welcomed to Palestine… I look at the desk where Dr. Husam welcomed me… there is no desk anymore… a huge hole in the ceiling around 1 metre long… then the black sofas surrounding the place, are no longer black… and they are definitely no longer sofas…
"There is a victory in the sense of the Palestinian people's determination and will remaining intact" Dr. As'ad tells me…
Dr. Imad tells me that they destroyed over 500 olive tree in his yard… "the issue of the olive trees, Natalie, this issue… is more important than the destruction of the homes…" [I know a proverb that my relative constantly told me when I was young, "man yaqtali'u li shajara, aqtaa' lahu 'ra'sah", I do not wish to translate this proverb, because there are many Orientalists around… I can explain it if you email me]
Dr. Imad tells me mothers tell each other "You should thank God you have buried your son, mine… I still cannot find my son to bury him"… he continues that "whoever attempts to bring out a corpse, they would shoot at him… they do not allow the people to bring out the corpses!"
Dr. Imad is a professor of microbiology, and as a previous pre-med student myself, we engage in mechanisms in Organic chemistry and my nerdy self surfaces again… he tells me he cannot pursue any of his research proposals and there are no equipments to bring in due to the imposed ongoing siege…he wants to pursue his research in biodegradable energy, and renewable energy… he tells me that when people were using vegetable oil in their cars, rather than regular fuel, Barak insisted that Palestinians in Gaza use more donkeys… [does Barak not have a sense of humour?]
"Israel also begins the 'war' and Israel is the one that ends it… this reality is perpetual" he says. As we drive in his car with a friend of his in the front, Leila, Vittorio and I at the back, Imad discusses the roles of Iran, Qatar, Turkey and Egypt and how each of them has benefited from the war on Gaza to strengthen their role in world politics, particularly in the Middle East. He believes that Qatar, again, has won a central role in Middle Eastern affairs for herself… he sarcastically added, "Qatar is now the mother of all resistances." [surely, when it is not!]
As for Egypt, he says, it has been able to alter contents in the Peace Agreement that it couldn't do before.
As for Turkey, he sees it as becoming a central player in the Middle East and especially now with its dialogue with Hamas… becoming a mediator. Also mediating its joining the EU with that…
Iran has a grip over the Islamic Jihad, he continues, and it has the power to control the flow of weaponry to them, and, as such, can manipulate world affairs…
He was particularly upset about the UNRWA in that he admitted its role to be obstructing the development of society. "You should not give me fish, but, rather, teach me how to fish…" he says that the UNRWA has provided people with all basic needs to an extent that they wouldn't reach out to fetch them themselves… they have the UNRWA… so, resistance is fed… water, not fuel. "I want to produce and rely on myself… but, in the case of the UNRWA here, that is not done as it constantly places food in our mouths, indirectly making for complete dependence on it."
After going into his home and seeing the amount of destruction… even the bathroom they targeted. In one of the bedrooms there was a closet made with cherry trees' wood. "It used to belong to my grandmother, and I wanted to give it to my daughter when she got married…" the closet is now but a bunch of pieces… memories, emotional ties… it is not just a closet, neither is it just a house, a piece of cloth, a tree… look at what is beyond that, the image, the sentiment, the symbol… the symbol.
As I get into Imad's living room I see a painting of a woman, with traditional Palestinian attire, pink [remember that the colour pink is targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces… pink pajamas... especially children in pink pajamas]… the painting was on the floor, and there was a hole in the wall where it used to hang… it was a beautiful painting… vibrant and full of life… perhaps, that is why it was targeted. On another wall, there was a photo of a man and woman in an intimate position, kissing… I stood in front of it. Don't we have the right to love and intimacy too? We want the right to love and intimacy too…
They bombed two bedrooms, and the holes were just above the beds… the ruins were all on the bed. Intimacy… 'love'… sex… destroyed. A society whose right to develop hindered, obstructed. This reality is profoundly visible, especially when potential is portrayed, dreams and wishes narrated and explored. The want to be… but, a destruction to this want ultimately crushed… and then what?
We walk uphill towards the Olive orchard. Imad has over 500 olive trees… they are all uprooted. Symbol…
A woman walks towards us crying. "Even the olive trees… even our trees… you murderers!"
Symbol...
We walk towards an adjacent house, and some children come to my side. They look at my notebook, my hair, my kohl, my pen, my bag… "you're Arab?" when I speak Arabic they cheer… "from Lebanon," I say… "Lubnaniyyeh! Lubnaniyyeh!" [Lebanese! Lebanese!] the happiness in their eyes and the life in their voices is worth a thousand words, a thousand statements, a thousand articles…. A thousand images…
"Death passed from here" tells me Sami… death with the destruction of all the houses, leveled down to the ground, people in front of the houses rest with their children and the tea kettles on some wood with fire… resistance… resistance!
We are exactly at the Eastern neighborhoods of Jabalya town… Vittorio teases me about my education at the American University in Beirut… "American! American"… I tease him back, "White European colonial master"… he shuts up. [Vittorio is from Italy.]
I keep forgetting to mention the Zannana [buzzing bee surveillance plane] above our heads… I cannot believe that I have gotten used to it! I do not want to get used to it. But, I am happy to feel it doesn't bother me anymore… do you hear me, o magnanimous Occupier, your buzz does not buzz my existence anymore!
Natalie Abou Shakra
Humanitarian Activist
International Solidarity Movement
Gaza, Palestine
An ISM gathering took place at my place… I came in late, oversleeping at the office. I ran through the streets like a crazy woman, trying to find a taxi to take me to Tal el Hawa… Fida had called to say the time has changed from 11 to 10am. I came in, Sitt Wafaa, smiling, knowing it is I who is knocking, opened the door to a Natalie with shaggy hair, smudged eyes with kohl, puffed eyelids, untidy clothes… I hugged her and ran to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face. I waved to Haidar, Jenny and George who were already laughing to the scene… Haidar greeted me with… "Fagadan!" [still remember what that means? Fagadan is, in Gazawwi dialect, a state of madness… with humorous implications]
"You have become a true Gazzawi!" he said…
We are thinking of making a board of the ISM in Gaza… and we are thinking of the University Teachers Association to make up this board…
We all go to the University Teachers Association house [it is a house, with offices there for the university professors], Jenny, Fida and Leila in Haidar's car, and George and I in Dr. As'ad's dark green one… I speak with George in the modest Greek that I know…
The University Teacher's Association offices got bombed… the professors issued a statement against the Israeli Occupation Forces' aggression that same night… this same group of professors are also part of the "one-state" group that call for a one state solution for all its citizens in Palestine, disregarding race, colour, gender, and ethnicity…
Despite the grief, despite the destruction, we laugh and joke… Haidar does his impersonation of Dr. As'ad which is hilarious…. He depicts Dr. As'ad as he speaks to the media on TV… and we all laugh…
I see that three missiles were launched, two of which strike the building, and one the neighbour's home. I notice it to be an Apache bombing because there was no burning aftermath… the war expert analyses again.
"We are stronger, we shall stay, we shall return…" words on a flyer nearby
"Why do you think they targeted us?!" Kamal demands…
Dr. As'ad says that they had a donkey tied to one of the trees… here you have the answer why! [again, donkeys, chicken, Kousa, pigeon's nests, Mickey Mouse Lunchboxes are targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces… oh, and children with Pink Pajamas!]
Of course, the donkey was slaughtered [can you also pass this on to PETA to take action?]
This place is the first place I came to before I went to Dr. As'ad's home… it was at the University Teacher's Association that I was welcomed to Palestine… I look at the desk where Dr. Husam welcomed me… there is no desk anymore… a huge hole in the ceiling around 1 metre long… then the black sofas surrounding the place, are no longer black… and they are definitely no longer sofas…
"There is a victory in the sense of the Palestinian people's determination and will remaining intact" Dr. As'ad tells me…
Dr. Imad tells me that they destroyed over 500 olive tree in his yard… "the issue of the olive trees, Natalie, this issue… is more important than the destruction of the homes…" [I know a proverb that my relative constantly told me when I was young, "man yaqtali'u li shajara, aqtaa' lahu 'ra'sah", I do not wish to translate this proverb, because there are many Orientalists around… I can explain it if you email me]
Dr. Imad tells me mothers tell each other "You should thank God you have buried your son, mine… I still cannot find my son to bury him"… he continues that "whoever attempts to bring out a corpse, they would shoot at him… they do not allow the people to bring out the corpses!"
Dr. Imad is a professor of microbiology, and as a previous pre-med student myself, we engage in mechanisms in Organic chemistry and my nerdy self surfaces again… he tells me he cannot pursue any of his research proposals and there are no equipments to bring in due to the imposed ongoing siege…he wants to pursue his research in biodegradable energy, and renewable energy… he tells me that when people were using vegetable oil in their cars, rather than regular fuel, Barak insisted that Palestinians in Gaza use more donkeys… [does Barak not have a sense of humour?]
"Israel also begins the 'war' and Israel is the one that ends it… this reality is perpetual" he says. As we drive in his car with a friend of his in the front, Leila, Vittorio and I at the back, Imad discusses the roles of Iran, Qatar, Turkey and Egypt and how each of them has benefited from the war on Gaza to strengthen their role in world politics, particularly in the Middle East. He believes that Qatar, again, has won a central role in Middle Eastern affairs for herself… he sarcastically added, "Qatar is now the mother of all resistances." [surely, when it is not!]
As for Egypt, he says, it has been able to alter contents in the Peace Agreement that it couldn't do before.
As for Turkey, he sees it as becoming a central player in the Middle East and especially now with its dialogue with Hamas… becoming a mediator. Also mediating its joining the EU with that…
Iran has a grip over the Islamic Jihad, he continues, and it has the power to control the flow of weaponry to them, and, as such, can manipulate world affairs…
He was particularly upset about the UNRWA in that he admitted its role to be obstructing the development of society. "You should not give me fish, but, rather, teach me how to fish…" he says that the UNRWA has provided people with all basic needs to an extent that they wouldn't reach out to fetch them themselves… they have the UNRWA… so, resistance is fed… water, not fuel. "I want to produce and rely on myself… but, in the case of the UNRWA here, that is not done as it constantly places food in our mouths, indirectly making for complete dependence on it."
After going into his home and seeing the amount of destruction… even the bathroom they targeted. In one of the bedrooms there was a closet made with cherry trees' wood. "It used to belong to my grandmother, and I wanted to give it to my daughter when she got married…" the closet is now but a bunch of pieces… memories, emotional ties… it is not just a closet, neither is it just a house, a piece of cloth, a tree… look at what is beyond that, the image, the sentiment, the symbol… the symbol.
As I get into Imad's living room I see a painting of a woman, with traditional Palestinian attire, pink [remember that the colour pink is targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces… pink pajamas... especially children in pink pajamas]… the painting was on the floor, and there was a hole in the wall where it used to hang… it was a beautiful painting… vibrant and full of life… perhaps, that is why it was targeted. On another wall, there was a photo of a man and woman in an intimate position, kissing… I stood in front of it. Don't we have the right to love and intimacy too? We want the right to love and intimacy too…
They bombed two bedrooms, and the holes were just above the beds… the ruins were all on the bed. Intimacy… 'love'… sex… destroyed. A society whose right to develop hindered, obstructed. This reality is profoundly visible, especially when potential is portrayed, dreams and wishes narrated and explored. The want to be… but, a destruction to this want ultimately crushed… and then what?
We walk uphill towards the Olive orchard. Imad has over 500 olive trees… they are all uprooted. Symbol…
A woman walks towards us crying. "Even the olive trees… even our trees… you murderers!"
Symbol...
We walk towards an adjacent house, and some children come to my side. They look at my notebook, my hair, my kohl, my pen, my bag… "you're Arab?" when I speak Arabic they cheer… "from Lebanon," I say… "Lubnaniyyeh! Lubnaniyyeh!" [Lebanese! Lebanese!] the happiness in their eyes and the life in their voices is worth a thousand words, a thousand statements, a thousand articles…. A thousand images…
"Death passed from here" tells me Sami… death with the destruction of all the houses, leveled down to the ground, people in front of the houses rest with their children and the tea kettles on some wood with fire… resistance… resistance!
We are exactly at the Eastern neighborhoods of Jabalya town… Vittorio teases me about my education at the American University in Beirut… "American! American"… I tease him back, "White European colonial master"… he shuts up. [Vittorio is from Italy.]
I keep forgetting to mention the Zannana [buzzing bee surveillance plane] above our heads… I cannot believe that I have gotten used to it! I do not want to get used to it. But, I am happy to feel it doesn't bother me anymore… do you hear me, o magnanimous Occupier, your buzz does not buzz my existence anymore!
Natalie Abou Shakra
Humanitarian Activist
International Solidarity Movement
Gaza, Palestine
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Prof. Said Abdelwahed: The first day at school in Gaza
Day one back to school in Gaza wintessed new stories of trumatized school boys and girls! For instance, my youngest son did not want to go to school because e was scared of what e said a new Israeli attack. He wintessed the first surprise attack by F16s on the former Preventive Secutiry Department's compound. On spot five civilians -- were passing by -- died. Three of them died meters from where he was standing waiting for his school bus! Hardly I could convince him that it would be okay and school administration will devote the whole school day to playing, acting and entertaining. By the way, my son Kareem 12 years old, is the first of the honor list of his class and he loves his school and teachers! He came back with strories of other as they suffered from the invasion. Each pupile told a new story of horror; eveyone was traumatized!
My elder son Khaldoun 16 years of age, holder of American passport, came back with a story of one pupile killed in an air raid and another one injured in his hand and rushed to hspital. As soon as he arrived at the hospital, his hand mutilated. School was sad with horrendous stories as well.
Somoud 17 years old daughter. She holds American passport. She went to school after long discussion with me. I convinced her to go and see day one; it would be okay. There, she heard more maturely told stories of torture by the Israeli soldiers! As she left school walking, her classmate dugged her foot hard on the ground. The sand blazed from a sharpnel; after eight days of the Israeli withdrawl there are still white posphorous remains that may flame again under some circumistances!
Last night was my first night to sleep well after more than thrity days, but I am still worried about my children. Two of them are still unable to sleep in their beds. I will keep trying with them until they go back to normal life.
My elder son Khaldoun 16 years of age, holder of American passport, came back with a story of one pupile killed in an air raid and another one injured in his hand and rushed to hspital. As soon as he arrived at the hospital, his hand mutilated. School was sad with horrendous stories as well.
Somoud 17 years old daughter. She holds American passport. She went to school after long discussion with me. I convinced her to go and see day one; it would be okay. There, she heard more maturely told stories of torture by the Israeli soldiers! As she left school walking, her classmate dugged her foot hard on the ground. The sand blazed from a sharpnel; after eight days of the Israeli withdrawl there are still white posphorous remains that may flame again under some circumistances!
Last night was my first night to sleep well after more than thrity days, but I am still worried about my children. Two of them are still unable to sleep in their beds. I will keep trying with them until they go back to normal life.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Natalie Abou Shakra: Back home
Monday January 19, 2009
12:41a.m.
I went to bed, on the mattress on the floor. Beside me lies Sitt Wafaa, then Abdel Aziz then Dr. As'ad. We still have nylon on the bedroom window, and Sitt Wafaa still has the chair and the broken windows by the bedroom veranda door. I try to sleep, but no sleep comes by as I await the sun to rise to go around with the ambulances…
8:00a.m.
I arrive at Quds hospital, where we are supposed to do "taqyeem" today [evaluation of damages at the homes of the people and accordingly provide them with nylon and other essentials].
Mohammad, the head of the volunteers at the Palestinian Red Crescent Society, answers my phone call. I tell him he is already late… I was teasing him, as he has not seen his family, wife and children, for almost 22 days now… ever since the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror began slaughtering citizens in Gaza…
I intrusively ask about his romantic night with his wife… surely, teasing… he assures me, all went well! I write an article in Arabic… I dislike it, so I tear the paper. "Arab girl from Lebanon"
Ghassen called me yesterday… he told me that my visit here was symbolic, and very transcending of sectarian lines, especially intense in Lebanon… identity politics [siyasat el hawiyya]
I speak with Adel who tells about how they ran out of food in the hospital when the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror surrounded it. "We ran out of food and water. We were so afraid for the patients, especially those intensive care. They surrounded us and they shot at anyone who came out. But, Leila [comrade Leila] went out the instant she saw a family trapped outside and unable to pass to allow its children in the hospital. She let her hair free and waved her hands at the occupation forces to let them know she was a woman. She then ran to the family and helped them in."
He tells me about a little girl in the hospital who got paralyzed out of fear because of Israeli terrorism outside the hospital.
Someone passes by us whilst we speak and tells me as he sees me writing, he tells me smiling, "The hospital has gone back to work!" ['aadat el mustashfa ila el 'aamal!]
Adel tells me there are ten ambulances from the Red Crescent coming in from the Karm Abu Salem entrance. A group of staff of the Palestinian Red Crescent Staff are making "tanseeq" with the occupation forces, as they are supposed to give their identification and minute details before they are allowed into the entrance and before driving the "new" ambulances back to the Red Crescent here.
Saeb finds me and he quickly approaches. He is the secretary managing issues at the hospital, in the administration. Saeb has from day one insisted that "we" [fellow comrades of the ISM] have dinner at his place, "for the Lebanese that came in solidarity with us and stayed with us during this war!" I insist to him that that is not necessary, however, I jokingly add that if he promises to get shisha/ argileh for the rest of the ISMers that have fallen in love with it, and then I shall go. But, not an argileh/ shisha fan myself…
As we speak, a car drives by the hospital entrance crazily! A man with bleeding shot at legs is removed from the back seats. His jeans were torn apart by the bullets… and so were his legs… will he be able to walk again? [I cannot get into the details of what happened for security reasons, now… but, when I do write about this in my book, it shall definitely appear… many things will…]
I jump in the next ambulance immediately as we take him to the Shifa hospital, as the Quds hospital, after being targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror has been quite disabled in attending to the patients as is needed.
I jump near Mohammad, another friend and fellow comrade of the Red Crescent, in the ambulance at the front. Mohammad is engaged, and could not get married because of the severe financial crisis the siege had imposed, and not the slaughtering and post-slaughtering era… personal lives are affected by the Israeli Occupation Forces' of death and terror… even one's sex life… even intimacy… even love, even friendship… family… occupation, the Cause, they all become part of one's daily existence… affecting our lives in ways we are often unaware of… until… until we see others living in ways we strive to live in… then we become aware.
The man cries and screams in the ambulance… "please just let me take something to make me sleep… please!"
I meet Abu 'Alaa… his son was killed, 16 years old, by Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror's F16 bombings. His other boy, 18 years old, was killed by an Israeli Occupation Forces shooting, as well. Israeli Occupation Forces seem to really like being part of the Palestinian family. And what is the best way to do so better than murder? Murderers!
I was called into the emergency telephoning room, where the Palestinian Red Crescent Society operators work day and night. I was told that Abu 'Alaa knew of my coming here and wanted to see me from day one… but, couldn't due to the Israeli Occupation Forces' slaughtering machine. I was told he wanted me to sing for Wadih El Safi for him… el laylu ya layla… [the night, o, Leila(which is a name in Arabic meaning night as well) condemns me for not greeting you, and sends his regards to you…)
I was told, on the side, to raise his spirits… and this is something, that I admit to you, o observant active reader, that I cannot take responsibility for because I am afraid to not live up to the role of being an emotional support to suffering… I cannot accept this role. But, nevertheless, I sit beside him, and then, I listen… listen… listen to the sound of pain… to strife, resistance and agony… and listen… listen to the sounds of the wind singing the rights of a nation, of a people… repressed, oppressed…. But, ever endingly, resistant… I bow to that. [man 'aallamany kayf u'assisu watanan, kuntu 'aabdan lahu… Nizar Qabbani… who taught me how to make a country, I am forever his slave… which is usually said: who taught me a single word, I am forever his slave]
Earlier during the night, whilst raining… I received one message, from a dear friend… we correspond about the beauty of the rain, now in Gaza… and in one of the messages said "under the rain… you shall dance,"… and I continued, "under the rain, you dance for freedom, resistance, existence"
As I sit down writing this in my journal, a truck passes by… and I am surprised to see if carrying…Kousa! [Zucchini]… I realize that Kousa is being targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror… of course, again, with pink pajamas, Mickey Mouse lunch boxes, and… donkeys, pigeons, and… horses! [I saw a photo of a horse killed by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror… can anyone send it to PETA… at least the Zionist Apartheid state would be tried immediately for crimes against animals… not humans, as Arab blood, to the EU and US governments, is cheaper, we are not humans to them… terrorists!]
Someone passes by, he tells me about the bodies still picked up from under the rubble, of which the Red Crescent was shot at for attempting to pick them up…many families have been wiped out during this slaughtering of citizens in Gaza…
We get into one of the ambulances that are stuffed with nylon roles, scotch, and other necessities… we all sit in the little space in the back, around 8 individuals. Vittorio is stuck against me, and teases me on the way. I meet a reporter from a local news agency, who tells me that the people are tired and so are the members of the press as they have also been targeted, and exactly five slaughtered by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror. A man comes up to me as we go nearby to Hay el Zaytoun. He tells me about his niece who died a martyr… Sahar Hatem, who was 17 years old with dreams reaching the sky, her uncle told me. Her mother was also a target of Israeli terrorism, and is now in a coma in Egypt after she was taken via Rafeh there. Can you imagine what her reaction would be once she awakes to the news of the slaughtering of her daughter? He tells me… "she will hope that she never had to wake up again"…
The walls of the hospital is full of paintings and drawings… of Palestinian women, strong in posture, and keen in sight, usually standing with something in their hand as shepherds leading the people… at the entrance of the hospital and for the first time, I see a café nearby, in front of the Quds hospital… it's name was… "Happy Land Restaurant and coffee shop"!!! Happy land… when will this be a happy land, when will UNSC 194 be implemented, when shall they return, when will the Apartheid terrorist state collapse… when will democracy and secularism be the only solution, a one-state solution… when? Shall I live to witness it?
12:41a.m.
I went to bed, on the mattress on the floor. Beside me lies Sitt Wafaa, then Abdel Aziz then Dr. As'ad. We still have nylon on the bedroom window, and Sitt Wafaa still has the chair and the broken windows by the bedroom veranda door. I try to sleep, but no sleep comes by as I await the sun to rise to go around with the ambulances…
8:00a.m.
I arrive at Quds hospital, where we are supposed to do "taqyeem" today [evaluation of damages at the homes of the people and accordingly provide them with nylon and other essentials].
Mohammad, the head of the volunteers at the Palestinian Red Crescent Society, answers my phone call. I tell him he is already late… I was teasing him, as he has not seen his family, wife and children, for almost 22 days now… ever since the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror began slaughtering citizens in Gaza…
I intrusively ask about his romantic night with his wife… surely, teasing… he assures me, all went well! I write an article in Arabic… I dislike it, so I tear the paper. "Arab girl from Lebanon"
Ghassen called me yesterday… he told me that my visit here was symbolic, and very transcending of sectarian lines, especially intense in Lebanon… identity politics [siyasat el hawiyya]
I speak with Adel who tells about how they ran out of food in the hospital when the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror surrounded it. "We ran out of food and water. We were so afraid for the patients, especially those intensive care. They surrounded us and they shot at anyone who came out. But, Leila [comrade Leila] went out the instant she saw a family trapped outside and unable to pass to allow its children in the hospital. She let her hair free and waved her hands at the occupation forces to let them know she was a woman. She then ran to the family and helped them in."
He tells me about a little girl in the hospital who got paralyzed out of fear because of Israeli terrorism outside the hospital.
Someone passes by us whilst we speak and tells me as he sees me writing, he tells me smiling, "The hospital has gone back to work!" ['aadat el mustashfa ila el 'aamal!]
Adel tells me there are ten ambulances from the Red Crescent coming in from the Karm Abu Salem entrance. A group of staff of the Palestinian Red Crescent Staff are making "tanseeq" with the occupation forces, as they are supposed to give their identification and minute details before they are allowed into the entrance and before driving the "new" ambulances back to the Red Crescent here.
Saeb finds me and he quickly approaches. He is the secretary managing issues at the hospital, in the administration. Saeb has from day one insisted that "we" [fellow comrades of the ISM] have dinner at his place, "for the Lebanese that came in solidarity with us and stayed with us during this war!" I insist to him that that is not necessary, however, I jokingly add that if he promises to get shisha/ argileh for the rest of the ISMers that have fallen in love with it, and then I shall go. But, not an argileh/ shisha fan myself…
As we speak, a car drives by the hospital entrance crazily! A man with bleeding shot at legs is removed from the back seats. His jeans were torn apart by the bullets… and so were his legs… will he be able to walk again? [I cannot get into the details of what happened for security reasons, now… but, when I do write about this in my book, it shall definitely appear… many things will…]
I jump in the next ambulance immediately as we take him to the Shifa hospital, as the Quds hospital, after being targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror has been quite disabled in attending to the patients as is needed.
I jump near Mohammad, another friend and fellow comrade of the Red Crescent, in the ambulance at the front. Mohammad is engaged, and could not get married because of the severe financial crisis the siege had imposed, and not the slaughtering and post-slaughtering era… personal lives are affected by the Israeli Occupation Forces' of death and terror… even one's sex life… even intimacy… even love, even friendship… family… occupation, the Cause, they all become part of one's daily existence… affecting our lives in ways we are often unaware of… until… until we see others living in ways we strive to live in… then we become aware.
The man cries and screams in the ambulance… "please just let me take something to make me sleep… please!"
I meet Abu 'Alaa… his son was killed, 16 years old, by Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror's F16 bombings. His other boy, 18 years old, was killed by an Israeli Occupation Forces shooting, as well. Israeli Occupation Forces seem to really like being part of the Palestinian family. And what is the best way to do so better than murder? Murderers!
I was called into the emergency telephoning room, where the Palestinian Red Crescent Society operators work day and night. I was told that Abu 'Alaa knew of my coming here and wanted to see me from day one… but, couldn't due to the Israeli Occupation Forces' slaughtering machine. I was told he wanted me to sing for Wadih El Safi for him… el laylu ya layla… [the night, o, Leila(which is a name in Arabic meaning night as well) condemns me for not greeting you, and sends his regards to you…)
I was told, on the side, to raise his spirits… and this is something, that I admit to you, o observant active reader, that I cannot take responsibility for because I am afraid to not live up to the role of being an emotional support to suffering… I cannot accept this role. But, nevertheless, I sit beside him, and then, I listen… listen… listen to the sound of pain… to strife, resistance and agony… and listen… listen to the sounds of the wind singing the rights of a nation, of a people… repressed, oppressed…. But, ever endingly, resistant… I bow to that. [man 'aallamany kayf u'assisu watanan, kuntu 'aabdan lahu… Nizar Qabbani… who taught me how to make a country, I am forever his slave… which is usually said: who taught me a single word, I am forever his slave]
Earlier during the night, whilst raining… I received one message, from a dear friend… we correspond about the beauty of the rain, now in Gaza… and in one of the messages said "under the rain… you shall dance,"… and I continued, "under the rain, you dance for freedom, resistance, existence"
As I sit down writing this in my journal, a truck passes by… and I am surprised to see if carrying…Kousa! [Zucchini]… I realize that Kousa is being targeted by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror… of course, again, with pink pajamas, Mickey Mouse lunch boxes, and… donkeys, pigeons, and… horses! [I saw a photo of a horse killed by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror… can anyone send it to PETA… at least the Zionist Apartheid state would be tried immediately for crimes against animals… not humans, as Arab blood, to the EU and US governments, is cheaper, we are not humans to them… terrorists!]
Someone passes by, he tells me about the bodies still picked up from under the rubble, of which the Red Crescent was shot at for attempting to pick them up…many families have been wiped out during this slaughtering of citizens in Gaza…
We get into one of the ambulances that are stuffed with nylon roles, scotch, and other necessities… we all sit in the little space in the back, around 8 individuals. Vittorio is stuck against me, and teases me on the way. I meet a reporter from a local news agency, who tells me that the people are tired and so are the members of the press as they have also been targeted, and exactly five slaughtered by the Israeli Occupation Forces of death and terror. A man comes up to me as we go nearby to Hay el Zaytoun. He tells me about his niece who died a martyr… Sahar Hatem, who was 17 years old with dreams reaching the sky, her uncle told me. Her mother was also a target of Israeli terrorism, and is now in a coma in Egypt after she was taken via Rafeh there. Can you imagine what her reaction would be once she awakes to the news of the slaughtering of her daughter? He tells me… "she will hope that she never had to wake up again"…
The walls of the hospital is full of paintings and drawings… of Palestinian women, strong in posture, and keen in sight, usually standing with something in their hand as shepherds leading the people… at the entrance of the hospital and for the first time, I see a café nearby, in front of the Quds hospital… it's name was… "Happy Land Restaurant and coffee shop"!!! Happy land… when will this be a happy land, when will UNSC 194 be implemented, when shall they return, when will the Apartheid terrorist state collapse… when will democracy and secularism be the only solution, a one-state solution… when? Shall I live to witness it?
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Natalie Abou Shakra: Saturday, 17/1/09
Saturday January 17, 2009
7p.m.
I go home, as I feel the need to be around Sitt Wafaa, Azzouz and Dr. As'ad. I want to play cards with the children again. I realize I learn a lot from them, and I never want to be an adult, immersed in conformity to society and its standards, norms and rules.
Imad (Rima, Rita and Raghad's father), after I ask him to borrow some literary books from his library, takes me in the office and shows me all his books. He gives me books to read, searching every shelf and allowing me to borrow any book of my choice. He tells me, "I like to see people reading. That is why I lose many books, they never return them back!"
He left his home in Tal el Hawa to another area, as it was possible that the Israelis imprison him, like they did to many people on my block. Imad wanted to leave Gaza to do his masters, but the Occupation forces considered that a threat to their security and disallowed him to leave.
He shows me his Nawal Saadawi collection, Azmi Bechara, Ghassan Kanafani, Mahmoud Darwish… I feel euphoric. He shows me his photos with Abu Ali Mustafa, and tells me some stories of his early days, and about the intifada. As we sit and talk the children play around in the office.
We stay at Imad's and Taghreed's place, Sitt Wafaa, Azzouz and I. Sitt Wafaa tells me that Azzouz was worried about me! "He asked about you every single night you were away…" she said. He looks at me naughtily and smiles.
Sitt Wafaa was so happy with what I was doing. She told me stories of her youth when her parents would lose her and find her donating blood or working in one of the hospitals. She said she would have accompanied me everywhere had Azzouz not been dependent on her safety and well being. It was difficult doing activism while you have children, she told me.
We spoke about 1987 and about how women played a huge role in activism against the occupation forces. "The women used to go near the tanks and act as if they were the mothers of the boys that the Israelis kidnapped." Taghreed says [these are renown tales]. "My son, where have you been! I was searching for you the whole time!" and the women used to take as many boys from the Israelis as possible… "Now, the occupation forces do not care about the women. They shoot them." Taghreed continues.
At night, I sit with Dr. As'ad and we have some tea. He tells me about Turkey's role in the events and the positions it has taken during this massacre. He says that it has just promoted itself to being a good player in the region… so is the case with Qatar and Iran that is responsible
(ma fi hada… la tindahi ma fi hada…)(meaning: there is no one there..do not call..there is no one there)
10:31p.m.
It is raining heavily… but, it isn't cold… we are not cold any longer
Dr. As'ad, Sitt Wafaa, little Abdel Aziz… we are all sitting at the kitchen table. Dr. As'ad and I engage in a political discussion… Turkey and Arab nationalism… while Abdel Aziz, 7 years, is looking through a collection containing Naji el Ali's drawings. When I see a child of seven years do that… I feel alright.
Sitt Wafaa's family calls. Her sister tells her that she saw me on television. She asked is she could speak with me and Sitt Wafaa passed on the phone. All her sisters spoke to me. they were so proud of what came out of my mouth… when I hear such comments, I feel I have lived up to the role I assigned to myself for coming here and doing what I do, and did. If not… then I leave, as my coming and "doing" would not be effective. "Tahiyyati ilayki!" she said [salutations to you!].
Later, I got a phone call from the Red Crescent head of volunteers. They wanted to meet with me Abdel Aziz didn't let me go! He insisted that if I go the occupations forces would bomb and that I wouldn't come back!
I assured him that I am not going but that they needed to confirm meeting with me tomorrow to go around and distribute nylon to the houses with no windows.
I am singing an article in my mind. This is how I write… I have to be feeling something intense, either happiness, or sadness… pain, love… I need to feel an intensity of emotion, any kind of emotion, a high for me to write.
And I dislike diplomacy in writing… I could never do that. I was told by one of my dear friends and comrades to not to fall in the "sin of pride." He told me that people, after being through suffering, or those who have heroic work, tend to fall in this self-destructive existence… making the other feel guilt while the subject is proud. I admit though to have been conscious of my internalization of anger… I do not want to hate, nor do I want to become forever angry… but, I will despite all, and I know it after living two wars from the same death machine… never to forgive, never to forget-El Passionaria.
I get a wonderful phone call from a fellow comrade and dear friend from Canada… Ghassen… I thank him so much for his kind words and I am ever so happy to see all of you who write to us, and who persist on the morality and justice of the Palestinian cause (and the Lebanese one… anti-sectarianism and occupation forces' atrocities… Israel as war criminal…)… when we hear such words, and I have seen it here on people's faces … your words and your support do make a difference… and it is also very important to put those words into action and not only believe in them and feel them… need I say again how? (boycotting! Voting [for morality and justice and not for skin colour, gender, race and ethnicity]! Demonstrating!)
Ghassen says my presence is symbolic, especially to Arabs… and then I recall the identity politics of this all… woman, 21, Arab from Lebanon… how many stereotypes am I breaking…
7p.m.
I go home, as I feel the need to be around Sitt Wafaa, Azzouz and Dr. As'ad. I want to play cards with the children again. I realize I learn a lot from them, and I never want to be an adult, immersed in conformity to society and its standards, norms and rules.
Imad (Rima, Rita and Raghad's father), after I ask him to borrow some literary books from his library, takes me in the office and shows me all his books. He gives me books to read, searching every shelf and allowing me to borrow any book of my choice. He tells me, "I like to see people reading. That is why I lose many books, they never return them back!"
He left his home in Tal el Hawa to another area, as it was possible that the Israelis imprison him, like they did to many people on my block. Imad wanted to leave Gaza to do his masters, but the Occupation forces considered that a threat to their security and disallowed him to leave.
He shows me his Nawal Saadawi collection, Azmi Bechara, Ghassan Kanafani, Mahmoud Darwish… I feel euphoric. He shows me his photos with Abu Ali Mustafa, and tells me some stories of his early days, and about the intifada. As we sit and talk the children play around in the office.
We stay at Imad's and Taghreed's place, Sitt Wafaa, Azzouz and I. Sitt Wafaa tells me that Azzouz was worried about me! "He asked about you every single night you were away…" she said. He looks at me naughtily and smiles.
Sitt Wafaa was so happy with what I was doing. She told me stories of her youth when her parents would lose her and find her donating blood or working in one of the hospitals. She said she would have accompanied me everywhere had Azzouz not been dependent on her safety and well being. It was difficult doing activism while you have children, she told me.
We spoke about 1987 and about how women played a huge role in activism against the occupation forces. "The women used to go near the tanks and act as if they were the mothers of the boys that the Israelis kidnapped." Taghreed says [these are renown tales]. "My son, where have you been! I was searching for you the whole time!" and the women used to take as many boys from the Israelis as possible… "Now, the occupation forces do not care about the women. They shoot them." Taghreed continues.
At night, I sit with Dr. As'ad and we have some tea. He tells me about Turkey's role in the events and the positions it has taken during this massacre. He says that it has just promoted itself to being a good player in the region… so is the case with Qatar and Iran that is responsible
(ma fi hada… la tindahi ma fi hada…)(meaning: there is no one there..do not call..there is no one there)
10:31p.m.
It is raining heavily… but, it isn't cold… we are not cold any longer
Dr. As'ad, Sitt Wafaa, little Abdel Aziz… we are all sitting at the kitchen table. Dr. As'ad and I engage in a political discussion… Turkey and Arab nationalism… while Abdel Aziz, 7 years, is looking through a collection containing Naji el Ali's drawings. When I see a child of seven years do that… I feel alright.
Sitt Wafaa's family calls. Her sister tells her that she saw me on television. She asked is she could speak with me and Sitt Wafaa passed on the phone. All her sisters spoke to me. they were so proud of what came out of my mouth… when I hear such comments, I feel I have lived up to the role I assigned to myself for coming here and doing what I do, and did. If not… then I leave, as my coming and "doing" would not be effective. "Tahiyyati ilayki!" she said [salutations to you!].
Later, I got a phone call from the Red Crescent head of volunteers. They wanted to meet with me Abdel Aziz didn't let me go! He insisted that if I go the occupations forces would bomb and that I wouldn't come back!
I assured him that I am not going but that they needed to confirm meeting with me tomorrow to go around and distribute nylon to the houses with no windows.
I am singing an article in my mind. This is how I write… I have to be feeling something intense, either happiness, or sadness… pain, love… I need to feel an intensity of emotion, any kind of emotion, a high for me to write.
And I dislike diplomacy in writing… I could never do that. I was told by one of my dear friends and comrades to not to fall in the "sin of pride." He told me that people, after being through suffering, or those who have heroic work, tend to fall in this self-destructive existence… making the other feel guilt while the subject is proud. I admit though to have been conscious of my internalization of anger… I do not want to hate, nor do I want to become forever angry… but, I will despite all, and I know it after living two wars from the same death machine… never to forgive, never to forget-El Passionaria.
I get a wonderful phone call from a fellow comrade and dear friend from Canada… Ghassen… I thank him so much for his kind words and I am ever so happy to see all of you who write to us, and who persist on the morality and justice of the Palestinian cause (and the Lebanese one… anti-sectarianism and occupation forces' atrocities… Israel as war criminal…)… when we hear such words, and I have seen it here on people's faces … your words and your support do make a difference… and it is also very important to put those words into action and not only believe in them and feel them… need I say again how? (boycotting! Voting [for morality and justice and not for skin colour, gender, race and ethnicity]! Demonstrating!)
Ghassen says my presence is symbolic, especially to Arabs… and then I recall the identity politics of this all… woman, 21, Arab from Lebanon… how many stereotypes am I breaking…
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Prof. Said Abdelwahed: A burning hospital
Day 25 invasion time (Wednesday 21st January 2009)
It was an irony; they said the invasion was over; the Israeli tanks pulled back from their positions. I said, the invasion is not over yet. The invaders are still inside Gaza Strip. Redeployment does not mean withdrawal! Three summits followed to decide! Decide on what? I am not talking politics in this context, rather I am talking humanitarian! My major concern is the civilian casualties and human loses! Unfortunately, no one king, president, emir, or sultan, or country's delegation dared mentioning Israel's violation of human rights; their use of white phosphorous bombs indiscriminately against civilians and residential buildings was "not seen"!
One of the major losses comes from destroying the agricultural life! The Israelis destroyed a very wide agricultural area; it's wide as compared to the overall area of Gaza Strip. Their military bulldozers uprooted trees, destroyed greenhouses, plants, crops, water wells, irrigation systems, electric lines, and everything else in the green field, and I mean everything else around! They killed domestic animals, meat animals, and poultry too! The features of the place have changed! Even fences between pieces of land were destroyed! Even the homes of farmers were demolished! The agricultural field has turned to be as plain as the palm of my hand! Israel punished every Palestinian living in Gaza Strip! Among losses estimated, approximately 50% of the overall loses were in the field of agriculture!
In simple words, the Israeli war waged against Gaza Strip proved to be an indiscriminate punishment of everyone in Gaza Strip! It was a process of killing an upcoming generation; hundreds of infants and children were killed under rubble. Also, hundreds of women were killed in the crazy bombing of civilians homes! The Israeli justifications and pretexts were silly by all means. UN secretary visited Gaza; he was taken to see how innocent civilians live inhumanely in UNRWA schools; he went to al-Fakhoura school in Jabalia where 67 Palestinian war escapees were killed, and dozens others wounded by Israeli tanks shelling! Did he condemn Israel even with his words? So what! I really mean it; so what his visit! Three summits were held in the region without mentioning a word of condemnation of Israelis violations of human rights and war crimes!
In Gaza, people are still trying to find their dead. The first day after the ceasefire 103 dead bodies were found under rubble, then 26 other were found the following day, and search is sill under way. Whole families were wiped from the map of humanity! Now, if we speak about those who were saved and remained alive in a way r another, we would mention dozens of orphans in need of care! Who will take care of them with no facilities available and no official social program for the orphans? There is only one orphanage in Gaza Strip and it's a poor institutions depends on donations and good doers!
It was an irony; they said the invasion was over; the Israeli tanks pulled back from their positions. I said, the invasion is not over yet. The invaders are still inside Gaza Strip. Redeployment does not mean withdrawal! Three summits followed to decide! Decide on what? I am not talking politics in this context, rather I am talking humanitarian! My major concern is the civilian casualties and human loses! Unfortunately, no one king, president, emir, or sultan, or country's delegation dared mentioning Israel's violation of human rights; their use of white phosphorous bombs indiscriminately against civilians and residential buildings was "not seen"!
One of the major losses comes from destroying the agricultural life! The Israelis destroyed a very wide agricultural area; it's wide as compared to the overall area of Gaza Strip. Their military bulldozers uprooted trees, destroyed greenhouses, plants, crops, water wells, irrigation systems, electric lines, and everything else in the green field, and I mean everything else around! They killed domestic animals, meat animals, and poultry too! The features of the place have changed! Even fences between pieces of land were destroyed! Even the homes of farmers were demolished! The agricultural field has turned to be as plain as the palm of my hand! Israel punished every Palestinian living in Gaza Strip! Among losses estimated, approximately 50% of the overall loses were in the field of agriculture!
In simple words, the Israeli war waged against Gaza Strip proved to be an indiscriminate punishment of everyone in Gaza Strip! It was a process of killing an upcoming generation; hundreds of infants and children were killed under rubble. Also, hundreds of women were killed in the crazy bombing of civilians homes! The Israeli justifications and pretexts were silly by all means. UN secretary visited Gaza; he was taken to see how innocent civilians live inhumanely in UNRWA schools; he went to al-Fakhoura school in Jabalia where 67 Palestinian war escapees were killed, and dozens others wounded by Israeli tanks shelling! Did he condemn Israel even with his words? So what! I really mean it; so what his visit! Three summits were held in the region without mentioning a word of condemnation of Israelis violations of human rights and war crimes!
In Gaza, people are still trying to find their dead. The first day after the ceasefire 103 dead bodies were found under rubble, then 26 other were found the following day, and search is sill under way. Whole families were wiped from the map of humanity! Now, if we speak about those who were saved and remained alive in a way r another, we would mention dozens of orphans in need of care! Who will take care of them with no facilities available and no official social program for the orphans? There is only one orphanage in Gaza Strip and it's a poor institutions depends on donations and good doers!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Natalie Abou Shakra: Aftermath Moments (2)
Friday January 16, 2009
4p.m.
I am at Balmera, a restaurant in the Wihda Street which leads to the Jawhara building and Ramattan. Today, I chose to be here alone, just to think about the absurdity (as if that is possible) and to make sense of events.
Taghreed, Sitt Wafaa neighbour, gave the latter the keys to her home. They Israelis were bombing heavily and our house is prone to strikes more than the inner apartment, which is Taghreed's and Imad's, her husband, the parents of Rima, 10, Rita, 8, and Raghad, 5. Many jokes are made about the fact that I am Lebanese and that the Israelis bombed Tal el Hawa knowing I was there. It is the sad truth: Lebanese and Palestinian... bomb!
As I leave the restaurant, I pass by a store. I am surprised to see a store open! I take a peak inside out of curiosity: it is a children's toy store! [extremely small with a small variety of toys]
I go in… two men sit in front of a desk. The room is not lit, and the entrance is partially open to allow the sun rays.
I tell them how happy I am to see they have opened the store "under the bombs." They invite me to sit down and bring me some biscuits. One has left his house and has come to stay at the other's. They are friends and, now, share this space together… as they think with remorse, about the whole situation… we speak about Lebanon, the resistance… I tell them a little about myself, and they tell me about their wives and how the are struggling to bake for their children and themselves.
"what do you expect after this?" I ask… they answer… "nothing"… as in the usual: "peace" process… then another massacre
11p.m.
Later at night, at the Jawhara apartment, Firas and Imad go down to film my "life" for Al Jazeera documentary… they film how I wash the dishes with soap without the sponge, and the soap being that of which one washes their hands with…
After the camera shooting is over, Imad and Firas sit with me and talk… Firas who is 25 asks me how old I am… when I say I am 21… he goes insane… he feels afraid for me, and says that I am too young to be doing what I am doing.. I stubbornly insist on my role as active individual in her society, and in her cause, as well… that will knows no age and is restricted by nothing than by will itself.
Firas tells me that the Gazan society cannot develop as such… under a constant case of occupation, siege… and now this.
"The occupier is still on our land, in a place not theirs, one a land not theirs." He tells me sadly. "I am living in a place [Gaza has over 70% of its population as refugees, mostly from the first Nakba] that is not my home, not my land, and I shall be dying in a place not my home. How do you think that feels like? I feel estranged. After this massacre, Natalie, there shall be another so-called 'peace process' then, the same old story over again: another massacre and crime against our people."
Our days have become nights from the smoke of explosions, and our nights have become days due to white phosphorous.
Imad teases me, and tells me that I have taken all the medication needed for restlessness from Lebanon; the land of restlessness. So, he says, there is nothing new to me here.
Firas tells me that before the war, there was a struggle for the end of the siege. Now, he says, there is a struggle for ceasefire. "And when the ceasefire ends…" he continues, "we go back to the siege?!"
They tell me how life ceases to make meaning any longer. "There is no meaning to life," says Imad. "A rocket might strike me when I am in my home, at work, on the street… it is everywhere this death at the hands of the Occupier. What do you expect to do with your life when one of your young children dies, and when your home is devastated?! The only reason why people hang on to life… the only reason is their faith in God, and that is it!" Firas insists.
Imad jokingly adds, "people around the world count the stars in the sky. We are the only ones that have been counting Israeli rockets in the air since 1948."
They are called to work. Yoused enters the office. I play Abdel Halim, Maw'ood… he remains asking me to higher the volume… we agree that the Palestinian reality is that of the first words sung in the song: maw'ood bil 'aazab ya qalbi"
4p.m.
I am at Balmera, a restaurant in the Wihda Street which leads to the Jawhara building and Ramattan. Today, I chose to be here alone, just to think about the absurdity (as if that is possible) and to make sense of events.
Taghreed, Sitt Wafaa neighbour, gave the latter the keys to her home. They Israelis were bombing heavily and our house is prone to strikes more than the inner apartment, which is Taghreed's and Imad's, her husband, the parents of Rima, 10, Rita, 8, and Raghad, 5. Many jokes are made about the fact that I am Lebanese and that the Israelis bombed Tal el Hawa knowing I was there. It is the sad truth: Lebanese and Palestinian... bomb!
As I leave the restaurant, I pass by a store. I am surprised to see a store open! I take a peak inside out of curiosity: it is a children's toy store! [extremely small with a small variety of toys]
I go in… two men sit in front of a desk. The room is not lit, and the entrance is partially open to allow the sun rays.
I tell them how happy I am to see they have opened the store "under the bombs." They invite me to sit down and bring me some biscuits. One has left his house and has come to stay at the other's. They are friends and, now, share this space together… as they think with remorse, about the whole situation… we speak about Lebanon, the resistance… I tell them a little about myself, and they tell me about their wives and how the are struggling to bake for their children and themselves.
"what do you expect after this?" I ask… they answer… "nothing"… as in the usual: "peace" process… then another massacre
11p.m.
Later at night, at the Jawhara apartment, Firas and Imad go down to film my "life" for Al Jazeera documentary… they film how I wash the dishes with soap without the sponge, and the soap being that of which one washes their hands with…
After the camera shooting is over, Imad and Firas sit with me and talk… Firas who is 25 asks me how old I am… when I say I am 21… he goes insane… he feels afraid for me, and says that I am too young to be doing what I am doing.. I stubbornly insist on my role as active individual in her society, and in her cause, as well… that will knows no age and is restricted by nothing than by will itself.
Firas tells me that the Gazan society cannot develop as such… under a constant case of occupation, siege… and now this.
"The occupier is still on our land, in a place not theirs, one a land not theirs." He tells me sadly. "I am living in a place [Gaza has over 70% of its population as refugees, mostly from the first Nakba] that is not my home, not my land, and I shall be dying in a place not my home. How do you think that feels like? I feel estranged. After this massacre, Natalie, there shall be another so-called 'peace process' then, the same old story over again: another massacre and crime against our people."
Our days have become nights from the smoke of explosions, and our nights have become days due to white phosphorous.
Imad teases me, and tells me that I have taken all the medication needed for restlessness from Lebanon; the land of restlessness. So, he says, there is nothing new to me here.
Firas tells me that before the war, there was a struggle for the end of the siege. Now, he says, there is a struggle for ceasefire. "And when the ceasefire ends…" he continues, "we go back to the siege?!"
They tell me how life ceases to make meaning any longer. "There is no meaning to life," says Imad. "A rocket might strike me when I am in my home, at work, on the street… it is everywhere this death at the hands of the Occupier. What do you expect to do with your life when one of your young children dies, and when your home is devastated?! The only reason why people hang on to life… the only reason is their faith in God, and that is it!" Firas insists.
Imad jokingly adds, "people around the world count the stars in the sky. We are the only ones that have been counting Israeli rockets in the air since 1948."
They are called to work. Yoused enters the office. I play Abdel Halim, Maw'ood… he remains asking me to higher the volume… we agree that the Palestinian reality is that of the first words sung in the song: maw'ood bil 'aazab ya qalbi"
Natalie Abou Shakra: Aftermath Moments (1)
Friday January 16, 2009
3:a.m.
Comrade Vittorio and I leave Jabalya around 4:30p.m. yesterday to be able to go to Gaza city as there will be no transportation after the three hour ceasefire. The ambulance team at Al 'Awda kindly volunteered to drop us off at a location whereby we can find a car to get us back to Gaza city… as we were dropped off, a taxi immediately stopped for us and we asked the driver to head to the city…
In the car, in the seat at the front, was a little boy on his father's lap. He kept looking at me. I smiled, but he did not respond to my smile. His eyes were wide and brown, his look was condemning. As if I had just committed a crime against him, that is how I felt. Just as the driver dropped them off, I waved to the little boy and was surprised to see him wave back at me, still with the wide eyed look. He still didn't smile… he didn't smile.
We asked to be dropped off at the Jalaa' Street and headed from there to Bellarama, a mediocre restaurant that opens during the ceasefire time. Vittorio had lunch, as I just picked at my plate. I felt nauseated. My friend in front of me noticed, and began easing my stress with his words.
He told me I should eat all of my plate, "haram" (i.e it is not good) he said. There is no food, so we cannot go on leaving leftovers behind. We asked the staff to place the rest of the food I didn't eat on my plate in a carton plate and covered with a cloth to be eaten later. Preserving food was crucial, as it is present in scarcity.
I look into Vittorio's eyes as we pack up to leave. He suddenly becomes a child, no longer a man to me. We all become children here, there are no longer any adults around. This is one of the facets I am drawn to in this reality. No more adults… only children, we sublime to. Everything now, is genuine… everything, now, is real.
From the tragedy of a siege, to the tragedy of a war against us, residents and Palesintian citizens of Gaza… and survival continues, and love is strived for… strength is essential… and tears… tears should not exist now. Later, will come a time for tears.
The invasion of Tal el Hawa in Gaza city, was disastrous, one of the most devastated areas where the early massacres occurred (the Jawazat one, a section of the Ministry of Interior for paper work, ID production and registration). It is a newly built area, full of university professors of Al Azhar University, Al Aqsa University, and the Islamic University, employees and civil servants. The streets are wide enough to accommodate the Israelis tanks and ease their movement.
11a.m.
The taxi pulls over near a building of what was the Palestinian Red Crescent headquarters. What used to be a building is now but a block of black and grey solid matter. It is nowhere near what it used to be. I just look, take notes… Vittorio takes some pictures. The streets have no cars except the one that just dropped us off… Al Quds hospital the other night had over a thousand individuals in it, trapped and surrounded by the Israeli Occupation Forces. The Red Crescent staff were not allowed to send their ambulances out, nor were they allowed to evacuate the patients at least till the early hours of dawn where they evacuated half and the other half in the early hours of the morning.
Now, there is no one in. I take a look at the place where we used to, a day ago, gather around in. It is not a place any longer, it is an empty space, burnt with water from broken taps and displaced or melted hoses.
Four hospital staff sit outside on plastic chairs, and I approach them. "Everyone at Shifa?" I inquire. "All out… they left… only us, as you can see." They look at me blankly. "Are you staying here?" I ask further. "We shall remain here." They insist, with one adding "nantathiru rahmatahu ta'aala" [awaiting His might mercy].
Vittorio and I walk just around the corner of the burnt Red Crescent Headquarters building, which is adjacent to the Quds Hospital. Around the corner, lies the house I live in… Dr. As'ad Abu Sharkh's house… Sitt Wafaa… Abdel Aziz… I look at the buldings adjacent to it… they all are hit… every single one of them… by snipers and Apaches… I could tell. The building we are in, I realize, has a completely devastated seventh and sixth floor. I feel worried the closer I get, the more the devastation seems penetrative into the homes…
Vittorio tries to keep up with me, but I run to the third floor. I bang on the door. No answer. I bang on Taghreed's, the neighbour's door. No answer. I bang the two doors in turns. No answer. I go insane. Vittorio is irritated and screams at me to calm down.
I go down and sit on the floor. I feel tears coming to my eyes, I feel a rush of anger sweeping my body. My face is burning with heat.
"Natalie! Natalie! Natalie!" a voice very familiar… Abdel Aziz? I think to myself… "Azzouz!!!" I run to them… the road is blocked with what seems as an ambulance run over by a tank and another white van with a similar fate. The road is shut with these two vehicles on one side and on the other with sand, dust, and building ruins… the storage building for the Red Crescent Society is still burning and there is no roof on top of the one story, 50 metre store. All the medicine is stores there, in addition to the Red Crescent essentials. It is all destroyed…
I climb over the ambulance… Vittorio smiles, I catch him with a glance… Azzouz and Sit Wafaa run towards me… we hug… tears fall… despite the cold weather, I felt warm…
Dr. As'ad follows… "Natalie…" he calls me… and I run to hug him… we all stand together… looking at one another, as if we felt the sun shall not rise, and we shall not see one another again… we were wrong, and we were happy to be so…
Reporters gathered around to take our story… Sitt Wafaa was addressing her family in Ramallah via Al Arabiyya… it was her only method as no phone lines were working… and her family wanted to make sure she was safe and sound… she hasn't been able to visit them for four years now… especially after the siege…
Someone passes by us, he yells "you killed us, o Arabs!" [about the Arab betrayal concerning the war on Gaza… more of the Arab silence… ]
Another person passes by, he sees us and comes closer. He begins to talk about how we have become but a tool for an election game in Israel… [halak sha'eb li'ajl intikhabat israeliyya]
She tells me, as I was away during the last night, that they hit all the Azhar towers [the place where the university professors of Al Azhar University live… they have special residences called Abraj el Azhar, or Al Azhar Towers]… the hitting was random and some believe it was to scare people to leave their homes [that is an Israeli hobby, since 1948]… from the people who remained, and who were a few [ we did not leave our house, but many evacuated to nearby relatives… again, nowhere is safe… but, they evacuated to… and I hate to say this… die near their loved ones, altogether]
Devastation… dust, bricks, glass, sand, stones… all on the streets. some buildings were still burning and were black. I realized that the Israelis have shot with their tanks the basic infrastructure of the buildings… so, now there is a fear of the buildings collapsing, due to such targeting.
Another man passes by us, on the street… he says, "Israel wants our death in return for peace… the Arabs agreed on disagreeing" [Israel tureed el qatel min ajl el salam, ittafaqa el'arabu 'aala alla yattafiqu]
Vittorio realized he had a friend who has a house nearby. He leaves to check for him.
After making some interviews around the neighbourhood… I went up to the house, after Dr. As'ad unlocked it. I was surprised to see the house no longer a place I recognized. Dust was everywhere. Snipers' bullets everywhere damaging all the walls… there were no windows in the house to begin with… but, now there was no house to begin with too! The only thing remaining was the bedroom we all slept in, adjacent to one another. It was intact. That was a relief.
"A good Palestinian is a dead Palestinian" tells me an English teacher as he lingers around us for a while. He says that this motto is common amongst Zionists.
Alberto and Stephania go upstairs to see the house, and the damage it has become. Dr. As'ad explains to comrade Alberto from Spain, who does not recognize the state of Israel and who is making a documentary, that there are F35s, F16s, F15s, barges, gunboats, and surveillance planes being experimented on us, that there is an international conspiracy of silence, that what happened in Gaza is a crime against humanity, that the war generals and 'leaders' of Israeli should be tried… the illegal use of plated uranium and white phosphorous (used by US in Iraq too)… that he could see people leaving their homes barefoot [I bare witness to that too] carrying their personal belongings and blankets… which is reminiscent of Al Nakba…
Al Arabiya asked me to speak with them… but, I refused… and Dr. As'ad did too, after he was asked… boycotting Arab media that are pro-Israeli in their "objectivity" is also part of our boycotting campaign...
3:a.m.
Comrade Vittorio and I leave Jabalya around 4:30p.m. yesterday to be able to go to Gaza city as there will be no transportation after the three hour ceasefire. The ambulance team at Al 'Awda kindly volunteered to drop us off at a location whereby we can find a car to get us back to Gaza city… as we were dropped off, a taxi immediately stopped for us and we asked the driver to head to the city…
In the car, in the seat at the front, was a little boy on his father's lap. He kept looking at me. I smiled, but he did not respond to my smile. His eyes were wide and brown, his look was condemning. As if I had just committed a crime against him, that is how I felt. Just as the driver dropped them off, I waved to the little boy and was surprised to see him wave back at me, still with the wide eyed look. He still didn't smile… he didn't smile.
We asked to be dropped off at the Jalaa' Street and headed from there to Bellarama, a mediocre restaurant that opens during the ceasefire time. Vittorio had lunch, as I just picked at my plate. I felt nauseated. My friend in front of me noticed, and began easing my stress with his words.
He told me I should eat all of my plate, "haram" (i.e it is not good) he said. There is no food, so we cannot go on leaving leftovers behind. We asked the staff to place the rest of the food I didn't eat on my plate in a carton plate and covered with a cloth to be eaten later. Preserving food was crucial, as it is present in scarcity.
I look into Vittorio's eyes as we pack up to leave. He suddenly becomes a child, no longer a man to me. We all become children here, there are no longer any adults around. This is one of the facets I am drawn to in this reality. No more adults… only children, we sublime to. Everything now, is genuine… everything, now, is real.
From the tragedy of a siege, to the tragedy of a war against us, residents and Palesintian citizens of Gaza… and survival continues, and love is strived for… strength is essential… and tears… tears should not exist now. Later, will come a time for tears.
The invasion of Tal el Hawa in Gaza city, was disastrous, one of the most devastated areas where the early massacres occurred (the Jawazat one, a section of the Ministry of Interior for paper work, ID production and registration). It is a newly built area, full of university professors of Al Azhar University, Al Aqsa University, and the Islamic University, employees and civil servants. The streets are wide enough to accommodate the Israelis tanks and ease their movement.
11a.m.
The taxi pulls over near a building of what was the Palestinian Red Crescent headquarters. What used to be a building is now but a block of black and grey solid matter. It is nowhere near what it used to be. I just look, take notes… Vittorio takes some pictures. The streets have no cars except the one that just dropped us off… Al Quds hospital the other night had over a thousand individuals in it, trapped and surrounded by the Israeli Occupation Forces. The Red Crescent staff were not allowed to send their ambulances out, nor were they allowed to evacuate the patients at least till the early hours of dawn where they evacuated half and the other half in the early hours of the morning.
Now, there is no one in. I take a look at the place where we used to, a day ago, gather around in. It is not a place any longer, it is an empty space, burnt with water from broken taps and displaced or melted hoses.
Four hospital staff sit outside on plastic chairs, and I approach them. "Everyone at Shifa?" I inquire. "All out… they left… only us, as you can see." They look at me blankly. "Are you staying here?" I ask further. "We shall remain here." They insist, with one adding "nantathiru rahmatahu ta'aala" [awaiting His might mercy].
Vittorio and I walk just around the corner of the burnt Red Crescent Headquarters building, which is adjacent to the Quds Hospital. Around the corner, lies the house I live in… Dr. As'ad Abu Sharkh's house… Sitt Wafaa… Abdel Aziz… I look at the buldings adjacent to it… they all are hit… every single one of them… by snipers and Apaches… I could tell. The building we are in, I realize, has a completely devastated seventh and sixth floor. I feel worried the closer I get, the more the devastation seems penetrative into the homes…
Vittorio tries to keep up with me, but I run to the third floor. I bang on the door. No answer. I bang on Taghreed's, the neighbour's door. No answer. I bang the two doors in turns. No answer. I go insane. Vittorio is irritated and screams at me to calm down.
I go down and sit on the floor. I feel tears coming to my eyes, I feel a rush of anger sweeping my body. My face is burning with heat.
"Natalie! Natalie! Natalie!" a voice very familiar… Abdel Aziz? I think to myself… "Azzouz!!!" I run to them… the road is blocked with what seems as an ambulance run over by a tank and another white van with a similar fate. The road is shut with these two vehicles on one side and on the other with sand, dust, and building ruins… the storage building for the Red Crescent Society is still burning and there is no roof on top of the one story, 50 metre store. All the medicine is stores there, in addition to the Red Crescent essentials. It is all destroyed…
I climb over the ambulance… Vittorio smiles, I catch him with a glance… Azzouz and Sit Wafaa run towards me… we hug… tears fall… despite the cold weather, I felt warm…
Dr. As'ad follows… "Natalie…" he calls me… and I run to hug him… we all stand together… looking at one another, as if we felt the sun shall not rise, and we shall not see one another again… we were wrong, and we were happy to be so…
Reporters gathered around to take our story… Sitt Wafaa was addressing her family in Ramallah via Al Arabiyya… it was her only method as no phone lines were working… and her family wanted to make sure she was safe and sound… she hasn't been able to visit them for four years now… especially after the siege…
Someone passes by us, he yells "you killed us, o Arabs!" [about the Arab betrayal concerning the war on Gaza… more of the Arab silence… ]
Another person passes by, he sees us and comes closer. He begins to talk about how we have become but a tool for an election game in Israel… [halak sha'eb li'ajl intikhabat israeliyya]
She tells me, as I was away during the last night, that they hit all the Azhar towers [the place where the university professors of Al Azhar University live… they have special residences called Abraj el Azhar, or Al Azhar Towers]… the hitting was random and some believe it was to scare people to leave their homes [that is an Israeli hobby, since 1948]… from the people who remained, and who were a few [ we did not leave our house, but many evacuated to nearby relatives… again, nowhere is safe… but, they evacuated to… and I hate to say this… die near their loved ones, altogether]
Devastation… dust, bricks, glass, sand, stones… all on the streets. some buildings were still burning and were black. I realized that the Israelis have shot with their tanks the basic infrastructure of the buildings… so, now there is a fear of the buildings collapsing, due to such targeting.
Another man passes by us, on the street… he says, "Israel wants our death in return for peace… the Arabs agreed on disagreeing" [Israel tureed el qatel min ajl el salam, ittafaqa el'arabu 'aala alla yattafiqu]
Vittorio realized he had a friend who has a house nearby. He leaves to check for him.
After making some interviews around the neighbourhood… I went up to the house, after Dr. As'ad unlocked it. I was surprised to see the house no longer a place I recognized. Dust was everywhere. Snipers' bullets everywhere damaging all the walls… there were no windows in the house to begin with… but, now there was no house to begin with too! The only thing remaining was the bedroom we all slept in, adjacent to one another. It was intact. That was a relief.
"A good Palestinian is a dead Palestinian" tells me an English teacher as he lingers around us for a while. He says that this motto is common amongst Zionists.
Alberto and Stephania go upstairs to see the house, and the damage it has become. Dr. As'ad explains to comrade Alberto from Spain, who does not recognize the state of Israel and who is making a documentary, that there are F35s, F16s, F15s, barges, gunboats, and surveillance planes being experimented on us, that there is an international conspiracy of silence, that what happened in Gaza is a crime against humanity, that the war generals and 'leaders' of Israeli should be tried… the illegal use of plated uranium and white phosphorous (used by US in Iraq too)… that he could see people leaving their homes barefoot [I bare witness to that too] carrying their personal belongings and blankets… which is reminiscent of Al Nakba…
Al Arabiya asked me to speak with them… but, I refused… and Dr. As'ad did too, after he was asked… boycotting Arab media that are pro-Israeli in their "objectivity" is also part of our boycotting campaign...
Prof. Said Abdelwahed: Day 24 invasion time
Monday, January 19:
One day after the ceasefire comes into effect. Israeli F16 is over our heads! Tanks are still inside Gaza Strip. This morning Israeli warships shelled somewhere in Gaza. We heard it very clear! Gaza infrastructure is devastated. He who gets electricity and water is lucky. It is impossible that those who live in the edges of Gaza have telephone lines. Some areas have turned into debris, barren and desolate land. Today found more dead bodies of el-Sammouni's family. Also, found dead body of Elina el-Jarou, a Ukranian wife of a Palestinian doctor. One of her children was found dead with her too whereas her young daughter was found in Shifa hospital's ICU. Five foreigners reported killed in the invasion.
One day after the ceasefire comes into effect. Israeli F16 is over our heads! Tanks are still inside Gaza Strip. This morning Israeli warships shelled somewhere in Gaza. We heard it very clear! Gaza infrastructure is devastated. He who gets electricity and water is lucky. It is impossible that those who live in the edges of Gaza have telephone lines. Some areas have turned into debris, barren and desolate land. Today found more dead bodies of el-Sammouni's family. Also, found dead body of Elina el-Jarou, a Ukranian wife of a Palestinian doctor. One of her children was found dead with her too whereas her young daughter was found in Shifa hospital's ICU. Five foreigners reported killed in the invasion.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Prof. Said Abdelwahed: Ceasefire in Gaza! Is it a ceasefire? I doubt it!
Sunday 18 January 2009 (Day 23 invasion)
Ceasefire in Gaza! Is it a ceasefire? I doubt it!
This morning (Sunday 18 January 2009) Israel declared a one-sided ceasefire, however, on the ground they kept shooting at the contact areas. On the other side of the fence, hours later, the Palestinian organizations declared a ceasefire. Meantime, unmanned planes did not leave Gaza skies, and F16s targeted several places even after 12 hours of Israel's declaration of the ceasefire.
Elsewhere rescue operations continued. Only today more than 100 dead bodies were found under debris and in the other places in the fields and back streets in Zietoun neighborhood and in the northern parts of Gaza Strip, and where the Israeli army attacked and demolished! Many whole families including children were found under the rubble and demolished homes. Medical sources mentioned that 20% of the dead found today, were not identified! Among the dead bodies found, 17 were totally decayed, thus they were buried in one grave! Among the lamented families was al-Sammoni extended family that lived in the eastern part of Zeitoun neighborhood. In the early days of the offensive, the Israelis killed 13 from that family! Being civilians, they raised white flags and wanted a passage off that area but they were shot at and killed, and then the Israeli soldiers killed from the same family 15 others inside their homes! Today, as the ceasefire is in effect, rescue teams found 21 bodies of that same family again; it was said that 50-60 people from that family were shot dead by the Israeli soldiers during the invasion! The dead included children, women, and elderly. Death toll amounted to 1300 people. It’s unbelievable, incredible and mind-boggling by all means! Innocent civilians paid the most expensive price; they paid their lives! It was genocide!
The whole Gaza society is depressed for the losses of souls, havoc, devastation, wreckage, casualties and annihilation! Huge losses were seen in the agricultural fields, farmers' homes, and everything around them! Depression, trauma, shocks and pain are common among the civilians! I am shaken by the psychological situation around! Wherever the Israeli soldiers attacked inside the residential buildings they turned the place into disarray! They scribbled on walls Hebrew threats of death, bad language, David star and they scribbled on the Holy Quran too.
The Israelis still call by telephone Palestinian homes threatening them of another punishment! In the afternoon, an Israeli aircrafts threw anti-Hamas leaflets on the western parts of Gaza. It was a silly behavior because everyone in Gaza has experienced the Israelis mastering terrorism against whoever is a Palestinian regardless of his/her political affiliation; it was an all out war against the Palestinian existence! Throwing leaflets was a stupid behavior! That silly behavior did not move anyone after the ruthless attacks on civilians everywhere in Gaza Strip and the huge number of casualties, and the crazy number of deaths and losses among the people. What a leaflet can do to anyone civilian after he or she was bombed by F16 fighter-bomber. It's all idiot behavior!
Tonight is a time of cautious silence and anticipation in Gaza! The whole situation may flare up or explode at any moment! There are fears of other deployments of the Israeli tanks. I can hear a reconnaissance airplane over our heads right now. They have been watching everything! What else will Israel target? I just wonder! There are still untold stories of horror, destruction and death everywhere in Gaza. It is still that 80% of Gaza city live without electricity.
Prof. Said Abdelwahed
Instructor of English Language
Al Azhar University
Gaza
Ceasefire in Gaza! Is it a ceasefire? I doubt it!
This morning (Sunday 18 January 2009) Israel declared a one-sided ceasefire, however, on the ground they kept shooting at the contact areas. On the other side of the fence, hours later, the Palestinian organizations declared a ceasefire. Meantime, unmanned planes did not leave Gaza skies, and F16s targeted several places even after 12 hours of Israel's declaration of the ceasefire.
Elsewhere rescue operations continued. Only today more than 100 dead bodies were found under debris and in the other places in the fields and back streets in Zietoun neighborhood and in the northern parts of Gaza Strip, and where the Israeli army attacked and demolished! Many whole families including children were found under the rubble and demolished homes. Medical sources mentioned that 20% of the dead found today, were not identified! Among the dead bodies found, 17 were totally decayed, thus they were buried in one grave! Among the lamented families was al-Sammoni extended family that lived in the eastern part of Zeitoun neighborhood. In the early days of the offensive, the Israelis killed 13 from that family! Being civilians, they raised white flags and wanted a passage off that area but they were shot at and killed, and then the Israeli soldiers killed from the same family 15 others inside their homes! Today, as the ceasefire is in effect, rescue teams found 21 bodies of that same family again; it was said that 50-60 people from that family were shot dead by the Israeli soldiers during the invasion! The dead included children, women, and elderly. Death toll amounted to 1300 people. It’s unbelievable, incredible and mind-boggling by all means! Innocent civilians paid the most expensive price; they paid their lives! It was genocide!
The whole Gaza society is depressed for the losses of souls, havoc, devastation, wreckage, casualties and annihilation! Huge losses were seen in the agricultural fields, farmers' homes, and everything around them! Depression, trauma, shocks and pain are common among the civilians! I am shaken by the psychological situation around! Wherever the Israeli soldiers attacked inside the residential buildings they turned the place into disarray! They scribbled on walls Hebrew threats of death, bad language, David star and they scribbled on the Holy Quran too.
The Israelis still call by telephone Palestinian homes threatening them of another punishment! In the afternoon, an Israeli aircrafts threw anti-Hamas leaflets on the western parts of Gaza. It was a silly behavior because everyone in Gaza has experienced the Israelis mastering terrorism against whoever is a Palestinian regardless of his/her political affiliation; it was an all out war against the Palestinian existence! Throwing leaflets was a stupid behavior! That silly behavior did not move anyone after the ruthless attacks on civilians everywhere in Gaza Strip and the huge number of casualties, and the crazy number of deaths and losses among the people. What a leaflet can do to anyone civilian after he or she was bombed by F16 fighter-bomber. It's all idiot behavior!
Tonight is a time of cautious silence and anticipation in Gaza! The whole situation may flare up or explode at any moment! There are fears of other deployments of the Israeli tanks. I can hear a reconnaissance airplane over our heads right now. They have been watching everything! What else will Israel target? I just wonder! There are still untold stories of horror, destruction and death everywhere in Gaza. It is still that 80% of Gaza city live without electricity.
Prof. Said Abdelwahed
Instructor of English Language
Al Azhar University
Gaza
Sunday, January 18, 2009
From the Israeli Occupation Force...to the residents of Gaza, with love
Updated:
Below are the flyers which the Israeli Occupation Army delivered to the Gaza residents. In brief it says: Either you flee your homes, collaborate with the enemy or you'll be massacared.
P.S: There's an e-mail they set up to "help gaza". Make sure you send them the right messages
Below is the English translation of those flyers:
(Flyer 1):
To the people of this area
because of the terrorism that the terrorist agents of your area are enacting against Israel, the Israeli Defence Forces was obliged to react immediately to such acts and to work as such in your areas
We urge you, for your safety, to evacuate this area immediately
Signed: The Israeli Defense Forces
(Flyer 2):
To the citizens of Gaza
Take responsibiliy for your own destiny!
The terrorist agents and the rocket launchers in Gaza make up a threat to your lives and those of your family.
If you wish to offer your family and brothers in Gaza help, all you have to do is call the number below and inform us of the location of the rocket launchers and the terrorist militias that made you a victim of their work.
Preventing an atrocity now lies in your hands.
Do not hesitate!
We shall welcome any information you have to offer us, and there will be no need to mention any private information about yourselves. Discretion is guaranteed.
You can contact us on the following number:
02-5839749
Or, on the following e-mail to provide any data you have about any terrorist acitivity:
helpgaza2008@gmail.com
PS: To safeguard your lives, we urge you to remain discrete about any contact you establish with us
The Israeli Defense Forces
(I translated the contents... surely, the statements are in arabic... as i said, shall send them soon)
What really shocked me is the username they chose for their email. "Helpgaza2008" ?!
I think this e-mail of theirs deserves to be bombed with the right kind of messages!
Below are the flyers which the Israeli Occupation Army delivered to the Gaza residents. In brief it says: Either you flee your homes, collaborate with the enemy or you'll be massacared.
P.S: There's an e-mail they set up to "help gaza". Make sure you send them the right messages
Below is the English translation of those flyers:
(Flyer 1):
To the people of this area
because of the terrorism that the terrorist agents of your area are enacting against Israel, the Israeli Defence Forces was obliged to react immediately to such acts and to work as such in your areas
We urge you, for your safety, to evacuate this area immediately
Signed: The Israeli Defense Forces
(Flyer 2):
To the citizens of Gaza
Take responsibiliy for your own destiny!
The terrorist agents and the rocket launchers in Gaza make up a threat to your lives and those of your family.
If you wish to offer your family and brothers in Gaza help, all you have to do is call the number below and inform us of the location of the rocket launchers and the terrorist militias that made you a victim of their work.
Preventing an atrocity now lies in your hands.
Do not hesitate!
We shall welcome any information you have to offer us, and there will be no need to mention any private information about yourselves. Discretion is guaranteed.
You can contact us on the following number:
02-5839749
Or, on the following e-mail to provide any data you have about any terrorist acitivity:
helpgaza2008@gmail.com
PS: To safeguard your lives, we urge you to remain discrete about any contact you establish with us
The Israeli Defense Forces
(I translated the contents... surely, the statements are in arabic... as i said, shall send them soon)
What really shocked me is the username they chose for their email. "Helpgaza2008" ?!
I think this e-mail of theirs deserves to be bombed with the right kind of messages!
Saturday, January 17, 2009
The "Jawazat" Massacre. (When the Israeli warplanes targeted unarmed policemen in Gaza)
This massacre was the first thing that happened in the war. With no warning, with no signs of escalation, Israel bombed an unarmed policemen compound. Tens died instantly. Today, they are more than 1,100 ..and counting.
The "Jawazat" Massacre. (When the Israeli warplanes targeted unarmed policemen in Gaza) - 2-
For all those who think that those are armed men. Look closely at the pictures. None of them even has a pistol.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Natalie Abou Shakra: Redundant statements from Gaza
Wednesday January 15, 2009 (continued...)
Every time an ambulance comes, people gather at the entrance of the hospital… to look, to help… curiosity…
Saber tells us about some workers in the Red Cross that have left due to the bombings… he says that "it is now that we are needed, it is now that we work… it is now that we are effective"
As we speak, a woman passes by screaming "my husband! My husband! Where is my husband?! They killed my husband!"
Another woman passes by, she tells us the bakeries are closed (bakeries receive any amount of flour from the material coming in… they bake and people go to certain locations to get the bread and they wait there in long queues for hours)… that they have no money, are stuck at home, with no food, no water and no electricity… her little child, whose toe got detached due to a stone falling on it due to one of the bombings, looks up at us… we smile and she holds out her hand as if an adult…
I told myself, I need to find a question and ask people… Vittorio tells me to ask people what they think will happen, where will they live, and such matters… anything I think about to ask people, I feel it is stupid and trivial during such times… but, one must ask (so, please suggest anything you want to know o precious reader… you also have a voice… through me though!)
ISMers gather around, we meet and decide to have a press conference telling people we are getting into certain locations to get wounded out, so that they get the proper treatment… after the little get together… Vittorio and I go to hear from the people in the hospital… it is very important to get them to talk… even to us… to let it out: all the horror, shock, frustration, sadness…
We get to the second floor, where we meet Ahmad Jaber… he was evacuating with his family when the Israeli "defence" forces decided to defend themselves against his children who were wearing "pink pajamas" that the Israelis mistook for pink Qassam rockets… their house is in Jabalaya el Balad, or Jabalya Town as translated… three F16 bombs fell on their house as soon as they got out…there are 14 members in his family… he and his brothers got into the hospital as wounded… his sister as well and another brother got to go to Egypt via the Rafeh entrance that only opens for the dead… this makes Mubarak, who is also known as La Vache Kiri (can someone please tell him that), laugh more, and wider… (don't you notice how wide his smile is… what is he smiling about?!)
There were 7 wounded from his family he tells me… a nine year old boy from the Hosni family was slaughtered, and an 8 year old girl from the Halawa family was also slaughtered during the Israeli bombing
Ahmad tells me that the citizens are the targets… "they target us, who do you think they are targeting: armed militias? Were these children armed? Did I have ammunition in my home? Why did they target my home? They haven't killed any Hamas figure other than Nizar Rayan, who insisted and made known that he shall not leave his home… so, that wasn't even an intelligent guess for the Israelis! And despite all this, I tell you… we shall not be humiliated neither shall we be insulted! This is the honour that we give our land… our lives!"
Iyad Muttawwaq, who lay in bed after splinters from the bombs were sprayed onto his body… he lay sad… motionless… we approached him, near Ahmad, he said "I am a regular civilian…" he said that he was close to where they bombed in the Bourj Sultan in Jabalya el Balad, Jabalya town, and when he saw people fall because of the bomb, he hurried to help, and within seconds they bombed again… four citizens were slayed, their flesh torn open, one a father of nine daughters, and two other brothers…he told me that during his stay at the hospital they brought his sister in decapitated by one of the Israeli tank bombings… where his sister's head got cut off…
Another old man was looking at us… very shocked, didn't even open his mouth to speak… looked at us and when I asked what was wrong… was told his house was bombed along with his wife… I remembered my grandfather… he looked like him…
We stayed to chat for them for hours, and before we left… the doctor took me aside… he told me that Ahmad's seven year old daughter Alaa was slaughtered… her body torn apart… that Ahmad didn't know so that his health does not deteriorate…(never to forgive, never to forget… El Passionaria…)
I visit the women's section, where I see another old woman, lying hurt… in pain… her daughter helps her with food… "the terror, the children screaming… no food… no money… no electricity" I don't want to repeat myself to you, but these statements are redundant wherever I go… note that down
I hear from the nurses that their our bodies eaten by dogs cannot be reached by the paramedics because Israelis shoot at them… dogs are eating dead people's flesh!
There are bodied rotten and decomposed in many areas… especially in the Abed Rabbu area… where there are the highest numbers of the wounded unattended to because of the Israelis "kindness and humanity"
"we cannot take it anymore" says Nihad… a nurse, "we cannot take it any longer! The images are horrific, the killing brutal…"
She told me about a family who was kind enough to go and bake for the hospital… as they got out with their taboon (to bake the bread) the children and the father were bombed… they became flesh on the streets… the dough was baked on the fire of their smoked bodies… the mother came in a while later… "please tell me only one survived! Please!" she said…
Enough…
1287… 1287… 1287… what does this number mean to you?
Now, 1070… and the numbers are rising… they are rising… and the misery is intense… intense…
I came into Do'aa's room… she is a wonderful 15 year old… her hand got amputated when the Israelis bombed her house… she saw me… I accidently hugged her and touched her arm… she shrugged away…
She was talking to me… and suddenly fell to tears… "it was my birthday yesterday! It was my birthday! I do not have an arm today! My arm… my arm…"
Take note of that… take note…
Every time an ambulance comes, people gather at the entrance of the hospital… to look, to help… curiosity…
Saber tells us about some workers in the Red Cross that have left due to the bombings… he says that "it is now that we are needed, it is now that we work… it is now that we are effective"
As we speak, a woman passes by screaming "my husband! My husband! Where is my husband?! They killed my husband!"
Another woman passes by, she tells us the bakeries are closed (bakeries receive any amount of flour from the material coming in… they bake and people go to certain locations to get the bread and they wait there in long queues for hours)… that they have no money, are stuck at home, with no food, no water and no electricity… her little child, whose toe got detached due to a stone falling on it due to one of the bombings, looks up at us… we smile and she holds out her hand as if an adult…
I told myself, I need to find a question and ask people… Vittorio tells me to ask people what they think will happen, where will they live, and such matters… anything I think about to ask people, I feel it is stupid and trivial during such times… but, one must ask (so, please suggest anything you want to know o precious reader… you also have a voice… through me though!)
ISMers gather around, we meet and decide to have a press conference telling people we are getting into certain locations to get wounded out, so that they get the proper treatment… after the little get together… Vittorio and I go to hear from the people in the hospital… it is very important to get them to talk… even to us… to let it out: all the horror, shock, frustration, sadness…
We get to the second floor, where we meet Ahmad Jaber… he was evacuating with his family when the Israeli "defence" forces decided to defend themselves against his children who were wearing "pink pajamas" that the Israelis mistook for pink Qassam rockets… their house is in Jabalaya el Balad, or Jabalya Town as translated… three F16 bombs fell on their house as soon as they got out…there are 14 members in his family… he and his brothers got into the hospital as wounded… his sister as well and another brother got to go to Egypt via the Rafeh entrance that only opens for the dead… this makes Mubarak, who is also known as La Vache Kiri (can someone please tell him that), laugh more, and wider… (don't you notice how wide his smile is… what is he smiling about?!)
There were 7 wounded from his family he tells me… a nine year old boy from the Hosni family was slaughtered, and an 8 year old girl from the Halawa family was also slaughtered during the Israeli bombing
Ahmad tells me that the citizens are the targets… "they target us, who do you think they are targeting: armed militias? Were these children armed? Did I have ammunition in my home? Why did they target my home? They haven't killed any Hamas figure other than Nizar Rayan, who insisted and made known that he shall not leave his home… so, that wasn't even an intelligent guess for the Israelis! And despite all this, I tell you… we shall not be humiliated neither shall we be insulted! This is the honour that we give our land… our lives!"
Iyad Muttawwaq, who lay in bed after splinters from the bombs were sprayed onto his body… he lay sad… motionless… we approached him, near Ahmad, he said "I am a regular civilian…" he said that he was close to where they bombed in the Bourj Sultan in Jabalya el Balad, Jabalya town, and when he saw people fall because of the bomb, he hurried to help, and within seconds they bombed again… four citizens were slayed, their flesh torn open, one a father of nine daughters, and two other brothers…he told me that during his stay at the hospital they brought his sister in decapitated by one of the Israeli tank bombings… where his sister's head got cut off…
Another old man was looking at us… very shocked, didn't even open his mouth to speak… looked at us and when I asked what was wrong… was told his house was bombed along with his wife… I remembered my grandfather… he looked like him…
We stayed to chat for them for hours, and before we left… the doctor took me aside… he told me that Ahmad's seven year old daughter Alaa was slaughtered… her body torn apart… that Ahmad didn't know so that his health does not deteriorate…(never to forgive, never to forget… El Passionaria…)
I visit the women's section, where I see another old woman, lying hurt… in pain… her daughter helps her with food… "the terror, the children screaming… no food… no money… no electricity" I don't want to repeat myself to you, but these statements are redundant wherever I go… note that down
I hear from the nurses that their our bodies eaten by dogs cannot be reached by the paramedics because Israelis shoot at them… dogs are eating dead people's flesh!
There are bodied rotten and decomposed in many areas… especially in the Abed Rabbu area… where there are the highest numbers of the wounded unattended to because of the Israelis "kindness and humanity"
"we cannot take it anymore" says Nihad… a nurse, "we cannot take it any longer! The images are horrific, the killing brutal…"
She told me about a family who was kind enough to go and bake for the hospital… as they got out with their taboon (to bake the bread) the children and the father were bombed… they became flesh on the streets… the dough was baked on the fire of their smoked bodies… the mother came in a while later… "please tell me only one survived! Please!" she said…
Enough…
1287… 1287… 1287… what does this number mean to you?
Now, 1070… and the numbers are rising… they are rising… and the misery is intense… intense…
I came into Do'aa's room… she is a wonderful 15 year old… her hand got amputated when the Israelis bombed her house… she saw me… I accidently hugged her and touched her arm… she shrugged away…
She was talking to me… and suddenly fell to tears… "it was my birthday yesterday! It was my birthday! I do not have an arm today! My arm… my arm…"
Take note of that… take note…
Natalie Abou Shakra: Were donkeys and mules are so much needed
Wednesday January 15, 2009
1:13a.m.
I came into the apartment in Jawhara… I want to listen to Fairouz, and be alone, I want time to think…
I call Neta… and ask her… “do you think we do not value our lives to be doing what we do?” she says no, and then she reads to me the final email she had from Rachel Corrie… “this has to stop” Rachel talks about the demolition of houses, “devoting our lives to make things better… I am disappointed to be living in a world where this is allowed to happen”… Corrie wrote…
12:14 p.m.
Vittorio and I get to Ramattan, we hear the our comrade Queeva had made it in from Rafeh and she is at Ramattan awating we all go to Jabalya…
I am very ill, and have a killing pain in my chest, Vittorio finds a scarf lying around on the street, he gives it to me…
We get there, on floor number 9, and Queeva meets us…I am so happy to see her, we hug and the feeling of unity against this, is beyond words to describe…
Alberto is being called constantly by the Spanish embassy, they are insisting that he leave… he tells them he does not recognize something called Israel… and will only leave once the Bilasco family is allowed to leave… the Bilasco family, he says, has been denied allowance to leave Gaza… but, he, as a person who is a threat to Israel’s image of kindness and humanity… is under pressure to leave… he has a camera and is noting down… so, Israel wants him out… he wants to leave, though, because he needs to work on the documentary… he has gotten all the material he needs and wants to complete the work in a documentary… I believe in him…
Mohammad calls a taxi and we sit, six of us on top of one another in it… we head to Jabalya… our first stop is at the ‘Awda hospital, some recognize me as the “Lebanese who came in solidarity”… people ask me how I think of Gaza, and I try to focus on the similarity of atrocities coming from the Zionist state against the Palestinian people and the Lebanese over the years… and about what is happening in Gaza now, I answer them “kulna bil hawa sawa”… we are all in this together… it is now that unity is needed…
We are dropped at the Kamal Odwan hospital in Jabalya… and we talk to the PCHR activist there who wants to help in organizing our activities…I tell them I cannot get arrested now, I cannot afford it, neither do I think that anyone of us should take action in something that would make her or him prone to arrest… Saber says that Mohammad and I should not go… I joke that I shall dye my hair blonde, then go (there is a stereotype about Arabs that they are dark… no, there are many of us who are blonde… oh, and there are no camels in Gaza… and no we do not look like Bin Ladens… please! On the other hand, we have many donkeys, and they are in much demand since there is no petrol… so, mules are very much appreciated and valued during these times- I hope now that the Hollywood producers don’t substitute the camels for donkeys!)
Every time an ambulance comes, people gather at the entrance of the hospital… to look, to help… curiosity…
1:13a.m.
I came into the apartment in Jawhara… I want to listen to Fairouz, and be alone, I want time to think…
I call Neta… and ask her… “do you think we do not value our lives to be doing what we do?” she says no, and then she reads to me the final email she had from Rachel Corrie… “this has to stop” Rachel talks about the demolition of houses, “devoting our lives to make things better… I am disappointed to be living in a world where this is allowed to happen”… Corrie wrote…
12:14 p.m.
Vittorio and I get to Ramattan, we hear the our comrade Queeva had made it in from Rafeh and she is at Ramattan awating we all go to Jabalya…
I am very ill, and have a killing pain in my chest, Vittorio finds a scarf lying around on the street, he gives it to me…
We get there, on floor number 9, and Queeva meets us…I am so happy to see her, we hug and the feeling of unity against this, is beyond words to describe…
Alberto is being called constantly by the Spanish embassy, they are insisting that he leave… he tells them he does not recognize something called Israel… and will only leave once the Bilasco family is allowed to leave… the Bilasco family, he says, has been denied allowance to leave Gaza… but, he, as a person who is a threat to Israel’s image of kindness and humanity… is under pressure to leave… he has a camera and is noting down… so, Israel wants him out… he wants to leave, though, because he needs to work on the documentary… he has gotten all the material he needs and wants to complete the work in a documentary… I believe in him…
Mohammad calls a taxi and we sit, six of us on top of one another in it… we head to Jabalya… our first stop is at the ‘Awda hospital, some recognize me as the “Lebanese who came in solidarity”… people ask me how I think of Gaza, and I try to focus on the similarity of atrocities coming from the Zionist state against the Palestinian people and the Lebanese over the years… and about what is happening in Gaza now, I answer them “kulna bil hawa sawa”… we are all in this together… it is now that unity is needed…
We are dropped at the Kamal Odwan hospital in Jabalya… and we talk to the PCHR activist there who wants to help in organizing our activities…I tell them I cannot get arrested now, I cannot afford it, neither do I think that anyone of us should take action in something that would make her or him prone to arrest… Saber says that Mohammad and I should not go… I joke that I shall dye my hair blonde, then go (there is a stereotype about Arabs that they are dark… no, there are many of us who are blonde… oh, and there are no camels in Gaza… and no we do not look like Bin Ladens… please! On the other hand, we have many donkeys, and they are in much demand since there is no petrol… so, mules are very much appreciated and valued during these times- I hope now that the Hollywood producers don’t substitute the camels for donkeys!)
Every time an ambulance comes, people gather at the entrance of the hospital… to look, to help… curiosity…
The Truth About the 2009 Gaza Massacre
The Truth About the 2009 Gaza Massacre - A video that speaks for itself.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWXx2VYoqbU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWXx2VYoqbU
Natalie Abou Shakra: I see the light of the phosphorous bombs shining into the vacant space like sun rays
3:10a.m. (January 13)
We come back from Ramattan to the Jawhara hotel (many people call us after reading the blogs, telling us to stop jumping around!) we leave Ramattan, under the shadow of the night, our only shield against the planes…
When we get to the entrance of the building at Jawhara, we feel relieved… but, I hear that people are killed at the entrance of their homes… so much for being relieved…
Alberto and Mohammad go to the latter’s house… Eva in Jabalya…
At this instant, Tal el Hawa is being bombarded… heavily… Sitt Wafaa, Dr. As’ad, Azzouz… there is no way to get to them at this instant… I want to be with them…
1:13p.m.
I called Dr. As’ad as soon as the line went through. He tells me it was a horrific night. I can imagine it was. From the room where I was resting at, in the Jawhara building… I see the light of the phosphorous bombs shining into the vacant space like sun rays… as if the sun rose each time they bombed them.
They are like having a ton of firework near you… with an intensity of light… lots of energy to kill… to burn human flesh alive…
I feel very hungry… we are eating minimally… sometimes when we have food, we eat for the day because we know that no more food is coming…
Haidar invites me again to Ma’atouq… they have begun opening the restaurant during the daily 3 hours, hypothetical, ceasefire, in which last time, they killed the three sisters Amal, Souad, and Samar, 2, 4, and 6 respectively… this is the ceasefire of the Israelis… where are your pens?
I bring Vittorio along to introduce him to BDS, Boycott Divestments and Sanctions… the cultural, academic, political, diplomatic, and economic boycott of the Apartheid state of Israel… like what happened to S. Africa in 1958 leading to Nelson Mandela’s release in 1990 and his following election as president… and the fall of the Apartheid state… we are told that BDS has done since 2005 the work that was done in S. Africa in 30 years… we are very proud… like Chavez, and now Morales in Bolivia… we need to work on the boycotting movements to reach many countries and for them to work by it… we want to reach a solution of one secular, democratic state for all its citizens… without regard to colour, gender, race, sex… ethnicity… a state for ALL its citizens…!
We discuss objectivity and neutrality of the media… and Haidar says objectivity is what Al Jazeera does, neutrality, is what the BBC does… not taking a position… so, I urge you all to please take a position during this slaughtering… a position must be taken if justice shall be sought…
Haidar tells me the IOF is at Tsarreen, neat Tal El Hawa, shooting at any moving object… he tells me of the cocktail of sounds during the night… “they have used everything they have”… note that down…
He told me that they had to withdraw again at 6:30 a.m. so we know that they will return tonight, with more intensity than ever in the Tal el Hawa area… expect many deaths… expect this hand writing to you, not to write again…
Vittorio narrates to us what happened when he was helping the fishermen in the boat a month ago, when the Israelis imprisoned him and deported him… how they approached him with their guns saying “Vittorio, we are your friends” (they were holding their guns and aiming at him when they said that… so, now you know the friendliness and kindness of the Israelis… with the bomb they shake the hand… and bomb!) they locked him up in a bathroom… a filthy one with many insects… Andrew, Darlene and him, had to go on a hunger strike so as to bring back the boats to their owners, the Palestinian fishermen in Gaza… he broke his strike and got deported to Italy… and returned on my trip to Gaza, the 5th trip… (The Fifth Trip… sounds like a good title of a book… if I remain alive, I shall write a book)
Dr. Haidar tells me, now that I am becoming an expert in military tactics and in Gazan dialect… “Lelah min Gaa’ el Kela” (a horrible, disastrous night)
We come back from Ramattan to the Jawhara hotel (many people call us after reading the blogs, telling us to stop jumping around!) we leave Ramattan, under the shadow of the night, our only shield against the planes…
When we get to the entrance of the building at Jawhara, we feel relieved… but, I hear that people are killed at the entrance of their homes… so much for being relieved…
Alberto and Mohammad go to the latter’s house… Eva in Jabalya…
At this instant, Tal el Hawa is being bombarded… heavily… Sitt Wafaa, Dr. As’ad, Azzouz… there is no way to get to them at this instant… I want to be with them…
1:13p.m.
I called Dr. As’ad as soon as the line went through. He tells me it was a horrific night. I can imagine it was. From the room where I was resting at, in the Jawhara building… I see the light of the phosphorous bombs shining into the vacant space like sun rays… as if the sun rose each time they bombed them.
They are like having a ton of firework near you… with an intensity of light… lots of energy to kill… to burn human flesh alive…
I feel very hungry… we are eating minimally… sometimes when we have food, we eat for the day because we know that no more food is coming…
Haidar invites me again to Ma’atouq… they have begun opening the restaurant during the daily 3 hours, hypothetical, ceasefire, in which last time, they killed the three sisters Amal, Souad, and Samar, 2, 4, and 6 respectively… this is the ceasefire of the Israelis… where are your pens?
I bring Vittorio along to introduce him to BDS, Boycott Divestments and Sanctions… the cultural, academic, political, diplomatic, and economic boycott of the Apartheid state of Israel… like what happened to S. Africa in 1958 leading to Nelson Mandela’s release in 1990 and his following election as president… and the fall of the Apartheid state… we are told that BDS has done since 2005 the work that was done in S. Africa in 30 years… we are very proud… like Chavez, and now Morales in Bolivia… we need to work on the boycotting movements to reach many countries and for them to work by it… we want to reach a solution of one secular, democratic state for all its citizens… without regard to colour, gender, race, sex… ethnicity… a state for ALL its citizens…!
We discuss objectivity and neutrality of the media… and Haidar says objectivity is what Al Jazeera does, neutrality, is what the BBC does… not taking a position… so, I urge you all to please take a position during this slaughtering… a position must be taken if justice shall be sought…
Haidar tells me the IOF is at Tsarreen, neat Tal El Hawa, shooting at any moving object… he tells me of the cocktail of sounds during the night… “they have used everything they have”… note that down…
He told me that they had to withdraw again at 6:30 a.m. so we know that they will return tonight, with more intensity than ever in the Tal el Hawa area… expect many deaths… expect this hand writing to you, not to write again…
Vittorio narrates to us what happened when he was helping the fishermen in the boat a month ago, when the Israelis imprisoned him and deported him… how they approached him with their guns saying “Vittorio, we are your friends” (they were holding their guns and aiming at him when they said that… so, now you know the friendliness and kindness of the Israelis… with the bomb they shake the hand… and bomb!) they locked him up in a bathroom… a filthy one with many insects… Andrew, Darlene and him, had to go on a hunger strike so as to bring back the boats to their owners, the Palestinian fishermen in Gaza… he broke his strike and got deported to Italy… and returned on my trip to Gaza, the 5th trip… (The Fifth Trip… sounds like a good title of a book… if I remain alive, I shall write a book)
Dr. Haidar tells me, now that I am becoming an expert in military tactics and in Gazan dialect… “Lelah min Gaa’ el Kela” (a horrible, disastrous night)
Natalie Abou Shakra: Spending the time at Al Shifa Hospital
Monday January 12, 2009
4:35a.m.
We are staying at the Jawhara building which got targeted in front of our eyes days ago… the apartment is empty… empty space... Eva, Vittorio and I are going to rest there for a few hours before starting off… I have realized that we stopped having days and nights… it is but a continuous striving to work, act and do the entire time… we sleep when it is only time to sleep… and it is only for a few hours… they tell us to eat and sleep so that we can perform better, and I agree…
Yesterday, Haidar came and picked me up from Jawhara to have lunch… we had to discuss our agenda for the media, especially the boycotting campaign… and we do that as we eat… I miss chicken, I eat is as if I haven’t ever had it… I really taste chicken… it tastes delicious… we are at Ma’atouq the only restaurant open… they insist, on opening… and we insist to go… defying the IOF (Israeli Occupation Forces)
I go back to the apartment… Vittorio is worried about me as I did not tell him where I was… Eva left to Jabalya, she tells me, “if I were to die, I want to die with the people there, as I have formed emotional ties with them… I want to die there with them…” so, now we are searching for a place to die for, just in case… we want to die in a place where our loved ones here are at… I think of Sitt Wafaa, Azzouz, and Dr. As’ad… I want to be with them, and I don’t want to be with them, because I do not want to think of their death… so, I shun this reality out… no, they shall not die… khalas!
We were at Shifa the whole time… we weren’t capable of getting to Quds hospital because of lack of safety and “tanseeq” to go (I do not even know why people are calling the “process” tanseeq… it has nothing to do with cooperation, especially when the Israelis impose a reality, a decision and everything… they control… we defy… we resist)
7:11p.m.
I arrive at Ramattan with Vittorio, now we are an inseparable team. The moment I arrive, Russia today ask for two interviews, in Arabic and in English… I feel eager to go to speak… we constantly remind ourselves, those of us who dislike interviews, to go and speak… Haidar urges me to go, he knows I will not stay put…
Rami, from Russia Today, tells me about a 14 year old boy from the Sammouni family who survived the IOF’s slaughtering…
In the Hay El Zeytoun area, in the Souq Essiyarat, the IOF gathered the Sammounis all together in one house… the members of the extended family and that of Ahmad, the 14 year old… they were more than 80…
The Israelis imprisoned them, and we call that a Kibbutz to what the Zionists used to do with farm land… in one house, more than 80 souls, and then they threaten to bomb them… and they did… Ahmad, who survived along with his sisters and brothers, crawled on his bare elbows to help provide for his sisters and brothers from under the rubble… while both their parents, mother and father, were slaughtered by the Israeli attack on their house… till now, around 26 of the 80 people were brought out of the rubble… and there would have been more people alive had the Israelis not threatened to bomb the ambulances that are responsible for getting through… the 14 year old boy, tore his pajamas to stop his wounded brothers and sisters from bleeding…
Are you noting this down? Where are your pens? A 14 year old boy under the rubble, on his elbows, survived… on his elbows he brought his siblings food… from what was left in the house…
At Ramattan, we are evacuated… “the Israelis are going to bomb, now!” we are told… we take our things and run out… we go to the adjacent building, the Ramattan villa, and we stay there… for around an hour… awaiting the “kind and generous” Israelis for informing us about their desire to kill us… to bomb the place…
We go up again, unafraid…
Russia Today (the Television outlet), Tamer comes to pick me up, he video tapes me as I get into the car and out of it… what if it is the last thing my grandma sees of me?
We go down to Shifa Hospital after I finish… I see the Norwegian doctor again, Dagfinn, we await till he finished his interview… he is happy to see me, and asks if I have been making interviews, he tells me it is extremely important that I do… now I know how important this blog is… and I thank my dear friend Nader Houella for that… what you read here, is real and true, what you read are voices not allowed to get through but from this screen in front of you… note down…
4:35a.m.
We are staying at the Jawhara building which got targeted in front of our eyes days ago… the apartment is empty… empty space... Eva, Vittorio and I are going to rest there for a few hours before starting off… I have realized that we stopped having days and nights… it is but a continuous striving to work, act and do the entire time… we sleep when it is only time to sleep… and it is only for a few hours… they tell us to eat and sleep so that we can perform better, and I agree…
Yesterday, Haidar came and picked me up from Jawhara to have lunch… we had to discuss our agenda for the media, especially the boycotting campaign… and we do that as we eat… I miss chicken, I eat is as if I haven’t ever had it… I really taste chicken… it tastes delicious… we are at Ma’atouq the only restaurant open… they insist, on opening… and we insist to go… defying the IOF (Israeli Occupation Forces)
I go back to the apartment… Vittorio is worried about me as I did not tell him where I was… Eva left to Jabalya, she tells me, “if I were to die, I want to die with the people there, as I have formed emotional ties with them… I want to die there with them…” so, now we are searching for a place to die for, just in case… we want to die in a place where our loved ones here are at… I think of Sitt Wafaa, Azzouz, and Dr. As’ad… I want to be with them, and I don’t want to be with them, because I do not want to think of their death… so, I shun this reality out… no, they shall not die… khalas!
We were at Shifa the whole time… we weren’t capable of getting to Quds hospital because of lack of safety and “tanseeq” to go (I do not even know why people are calling the “process” tanseeq… it has nothing to do with cooperation, especially when the Israelis impose a reality, a decision and everything… they control… we defy… we resist)
7:11p.m.
I arrive at Ramattan with Vittorio, now we are an inseparable team. The moment I arrive, Russia today ask for two interviews, in Arabic and in English… I feel eager to go to speak… we constantly remind ourselves, those of us who dislike interviews, to go and speak… Haidar urges me to go, he knows I will not stay put…
Rami, from Russia Today, tells me about a 14 year old boy from the Sammouni family who survived the IOF’s slaughtering…
In the Hay El Zeytoun area, in the Souq Essiyarat, the IOF gathered the Sammounis all together in one house… the members of the extended family and that of Ahmad, the 14 year old… they were more than 80…
The Israelis imprisoned them, and we call that a Kibbutz to what the Zionists used to do with farm land… in one house, more than 80 souls, and then they threaten to bomb them… and they did… Ahmad, who survived along with his sisters and brothers, crawled on his bare elbows to help provide for his sisters and brothers from under the rubble… while both their parents, mother and father, were slaughtered by the Israeli attack on their house… till now, around 26 of the 80 people were brought out of the rubble… and there would have been more people alive had the Israelis not threatened to bomb the ambulances that are responsible for getting through… the 14 year old boy, tore his pajamas to stop his wounded brothers and sisters from bleeding…
Are you noting this down? Where are your pens? A 14 year old boy under the rubble, on his elbows, survived… on his elbows he brought his siblings food… from what was left in the house…
At Ramattan, we are evacuated… “the Israelis are going to bomb, now!” we are told… we take our things and run out… we go to the adjacent building, the Ramattan villa, and we stay there… for around an hour… awaiting the “kind and generous” Israelis for informing us about their desire to kill us… to bomb the place…
We go up again, unafraid…
Russia Today (the Television outlet), Tamer comes to pick me up, he video tapes me as I get into the car and out of it… what if it is the last thing my grandma sees of me?
We go down to Shifa Hospital after I finish… I see the Norwegian doctor again, Dagfinn, we await till he finished his interview… he is happy to see me, and asks if I have been making interviews, he tells me it is extremely important that I do… now I know how important this blog is… and I thank my dear friend Nader Houella for that… what you read here, is real and true, what you read are voices not allowed to get through but from this screen in front of you… note down…
Natalie Abou Shakra: Bombs closing in
Sunday Januray 10, 2009
4a.m.
“Wake up! Wake up!” they scream at me… I realize I have slept on a chair inside the Red Crescent office at the Quds hospital… Vittorio in front of me sleeping on a sofa… fellow comrades at the Red Crescent who are sleeping on mattresses on the floor wake up to the screams… “they’re invading Tal el Hawa!” we are urged to go down, to the operation room… all the hospital, around 500 souls are urged to go down! To the operation rooms…
Vittorio gets excited and moves around to take photos with his camera… and I lose him in the frenzy…
I get out of the room… my things lost… I don’t care, I lose sight of Vittorio… I go down the stairs, I see him and we head towards the corridor downstairs which is packed with people against one another…we try to speak to everyone on our phone lists… no one answers, phone lines disastrous…
I move into one of the operation rooms… they bring in a little five year old boy, Rami… Rami cannot breathe…so, we place the oxygen cover above his mouth… I play with him the clapping game with the hands… I do not talk but use a smile and human touch… they bomb extensively near us, and I jokingly cry: lightening! Lightening! Yay! (yay, alright!)… Rami is very brave, he does not shed a tear… he smiles at me and holds my hand… I feel reassured… I am saved by Rami…
Despite telling us to remain downstairs, I go up with Vittorio to the entrance… we thought we could get through the smell of ammunition and gunpowder… we couldn’t… the dust everywhere… intensively…
As we move, I write in my diary… otherwise, I tell myself I will forget… people look at me… I tell them “I am not a journalist!”
Mohammad catches us and pushes us down… he screams for us to remain downstairs… he brings in bread later on, and some Labaniyyeh (Labneh - a type of yogurt), and we pour it on the bread and we eat… we are starved… the storage room is right in front of us…
I go up without any one seeing me, to get a mattress to sit on the floor… Vittorio notices and follows up to the entrance again… he tells me he enjoys my company… when I ask why… he says “because you smile”… smiling despite suffering…
Khaled finds us, screams at us again! He drags us down… Vittorio sits with his laptop on the mattress as he writes, I sit with the guys… we talk about the situation… we sing… then… as we sit, people get in the hospital… they demand that we help in getting ambulances to nearby locations… we cannot… we cannot… even here, helplessness is apparent… no ambulances are allowed to go since the “Israeli Occupation Forces” (please use that rather than IDF) have threatened to target anyone coming out…
We joke that the Israelis are shooting here because I am… that I appeared on Al Manar… and that I am a Lebanese “kul el haq ‘aalaykeh” (it is all your fault!) they say jokingly…Later, I am surprised as someone asks me to send a call for help to Hassan Nassrallah to “do something about this”… people, please…
The Israelis tell people to evacuate by threatening them via the phone, or by dropping down flyers on them… both are terrorizing… and both are with bad Arabic… and when people evacuate… what do the Israelis do? You should know the answer for that by now!
4a.m.
“Wake up! Wake up!” they scream at me… I realize I have slept on a chair inside the Red Crescent office at the Quds hospital… Vittorio in front of me sleeping on a sofa… fellow comrades at the Red Crescent who are sleeping on mattresses on the floor wake up to the screams… “they’re invading Tal el Hawa!” we are urged to go down, to the operation room… all the hospital, around 500 souls are urged to go down! To the operation rooms…
Vittorio gets excited and moves around to take photos with his camera… and I lose him in the frenzy…
I get out of the room… my things lost… I don’t care, I lose sight of Vittorio… I go down the stairs, I see him and we head towards the corridor downstairs which is packed with people against one another…we try to speak to everyone on our phone lists… no one answers, phone lines disastrous…
I move into one of the operation rooms… they bring in a little five year old boy, Rami… Rami cannot breathe…so, we place the oxygen cover above his mouth… I play with him the clapping game with the hands… I do not talk but use a smile and human touch… they bomb extensively near us, and I jokingly cry: lightening! Lightening! Yay! (yay, alright!)… Rami is very brave, he does not shed a tear… he smiles at me and holds my hand… I feel reassured… I am saved by Rami…
Despite telling us to remain downstairs, I go up with Vittorio to the entrance… we thought we could get through the smell of ammunition and gunpowder… we couldn’t… the dust everywhere… intensively…
As we move, I write in my diary… otherwise, I tell myself I will forget… people look at me… I tell them “I am not a journalist!”
Mohammad catches us and pushes us down… he screams for us to remain downstairs… he brings in bread later on, and some Labaniyyeh (Labneh - a type of yogurt), and we pour it on the bread and we eat… we are starved… the storage room is right in front of us…
I go up without any one seeing me, to get a mattress to sit on the floor… Vittorio notices and follows up to the entrance again… he tells me he enjoys my company… when I ask why… he says “because you smile”… smiling despite suffering…
Khaled finds us, screams at us again! He drags us down… Vittorio sits with his laptop on the mattress as he writes, I sit with the guys… we talk about the situation… we sing… then… as we sit, people get in the hospital… they demand that we help in getting ambulances to nearby locations… we cannot… we cannot… even here, helplessness is apparent… no ambulances are allowed to go since the “Israeli Occupation Forces” (please use that rather than IDF) have threatened to target anyone coming out…
We joke that the Israelis are shooting here because I am… that I appeared on Al Manar… and that I am a Lebanese “kul el haq ‘aalaykeh” (it is all your fault!) they say jokingly…Later, I am surprised as someone asks me to send a call for help to Hassan Nassrallah to “do something about this”… people, please…
The Israelis tell people to evacuate by threatening them via the phone, or by dropping down flyers on them… both are terrorizing… and both are with bad Arabic… and when people evacuate… what do the Israelis do? You should know the answer for that by now!
Natalie Abou Shakra: They will not succeed in dehumanizing us
Saturday, January 10, 2009
11:28 p.m.
854 martyrs till this moment… I dislike numbers… these are numbers… aren’t we used to listening to numbers of dead people from the Arab world every day? Yes, people around the world have become used to death in Iraq, Palestine and other areas in this “occupied” region… (don’t think of occupation as merely in military terms… think of it politically and culturally as well…)
In Lebanon, 1287 were slaughtered in 33 days… 1287… 1287… 1287… 1287…
1287!
These were babies, women, teenagers, elderly, men… teachers, nurses, workers… doctors… shopkeepers, construction workers… journalists, (huge F16 above my head)… these were neighbors, relatives, lovers… the children used to play football, they went to school… just like you… just like in your neighborhood… we are human, and they shall not succeed in dehumanizing us… we have a right to fight for a country, for a land… we have a right to fight against those massacres… you are talking about the most destructive, largest nuclear power in the world… whom is fighting whom?
The women here tell me they want to fight with boiling oil, and boiling water… with knives and fork… can uranium be fought as such? Can F16s, F15s, Apaches, Surveillance planes… to name a few, fought like that? Are we terrorists to fight like that? Were those who resisted the Vichy government in France, the Nazis occupation, were they terrorists? Did you know that Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher used to call Nelson Mandela a “terrorist”? who is the terrorist ladies and gentlemen… who is?!
We took Eva to the Russia Today, interview… the streets, again, no lights, extremely forlorn… lonely… they are thirsty for a laugh, a foot, a human presence… that durely does not exist… we walk in a line, so as to hide from the snipers (that is stupid, because you cannot hide from the snipers)… we walk under the buildings… hoping the darkness would be the only shadow shielding us… we walk as if it is our last walk…
At the doors of Russia Today, we see a red Crescent ambulance that recognized Vittorio and I, they stopped and we were on board to Al Quds hospital… that was a relief not to walk… yet, I am not very proud to say that the ambulance took us for a ride… although it was on its way there… but, that is not what ambulances are for… so, excuse us this time for that…
It is quiet at Al Quds… I like that; no death, no screams, no tears… solitude…
I am working with Vittorio on getting footage ready from Al Jazeera and Ramattan so that “six million” people in Italy can watch… it is for the Italian public television… I wish someone in the Arab world would do that… other than the existing news agencies here… I cannot believe that people still watch Al Arabiya. Which many of us call Al ‘Ibriyya (ie: taking the Israeli side)… they watch it now, at these times… shame on you Al Arabiya, and also, shame on Al Saud who did not allow Saudi citizens to demonstrate in KSA… those are the allies of Israel and the US… those totalitarian governments in the ME… shame on you! Shame! Those need shoes to be thrown against…
Someone calls me to tell me they want to publish my article… they say they shall give me money… money from the tragedy of the people? That is why when I came here, I came and said I have nothing to do with journalists and journalism… please send your money to the right places, into civil society organizations that support boycotting of Israeli products… send your money to the PCHR: Palestinian Centre for Human Rights… I do not want to tell you where to send your money… you do not even need to do that… what is more important is your activism… your voice, break silence, demonstrate… vote! And please do not make it about color, race, gender… pleas make it about morality and justice… and of course, foreign policy… Obama of course, has defied all that in his “change”… he, I was told, was very concerned on the casualties on “both sides” on the first few days of the attacks… that is real “change”… I mean, after all, one could say that he did show concern… Haidar and I, again, talk about the importance of boycotting movements… about the role of the citizen and that of government…
I call my friend, Ayoub Othmen, a professor of English Lit. at Al Azhar… I am relieved to hear is voice… he tells me to send all the articles to him… he believes in me, he said… I don’t believe in anything but justice for all that is happening I say… he tells me that I have turned into a nagging pain in the b*** now, I say I am fine with it…
Vittorio tells me that to list anything I want in order to get from Cyprus as our ship is coming… for the sake of wanting it to arrive, I tell him a list… mostly of biscuits for Abdel Aziz… and Halloumi from Cyprus… that was crucial…
I want them to come (they do not make it, four Israeli gun boats surround them and demand they return to Cyprus)
Natalie Abou Shakra
International Solidarity Movement
Gaza, Palestine
11:28 p.m.
854 martyrs till this moment… I dislike numbers… these are numbers… aren’t we used to listening to numbers of dead people from the Arab world every day? Yes, people around the world have become used to death in Iraq, Palestine and other areas in this “occupied” region… (don’t think of occupation as merely in military terms… think of it politically and culturally as well…)
In Lebanon, 1287 were slaughtered in 33 days… 1287… 1287… 1287… 1287…
1287!
These were babies, women, teenagers, elderly, men… teachers, nurses, workers… doctors… shopkeepers, construction workers… journalists, (huge F16 above my head)… these were neighbors, relatives, lovers… the children used to play football, they went to school… just like you… just like in your neighborhood… we are human, and they shall not succeed in dehumanizing us… we have a right to fight for a country, for a land… we have a right to fight against those massacres… you are talking about the most destructive, largest nuclear power in the world… whom is fighting whom?
The women here tell me they want to fight with boiling oil, and boiling water… with knives and fork… can uranium be fought as such? Can F16s, F15s, Apaches, Surveillance planes… to name a few, fought like that? Are we terrorists to fight like that? Were those who resisted the Vichy government in France, the Nazis occupation, were they terrorists? Did you know that Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher used to call Nelson Mandela a “terrorist”? who is the terrorist ladies and gentlemen… who is?!
We took Eva to the Russia Today, interview… the streets, again, no lights, extremely forlorn… lonely… they are thirsty for a laugh, a foot, a human presence… that durely does not exist… we walk in a line, so as to hide from the snipers (that is stupid, because you cannot hide from the snipers)… we walk under the buildings… hoping the darkness would be the only shadow shielding us… we walk as if it is our last walk…
At the doors of Russia Today, we see a red Crescent ambulance that recognized Vittorio and I, they stopped and we were on board to Al Quds hospital… that was a relief not to walk… yet, I am not very proud to say that the ambulance took us for a ride… although it was on its way there… but, that is not what ambulances are for… so, excuse us this time for that…
It is quiet at Al Quds… I like that; no death, no screams, no tears… solitude…
I am working with Vittorio on getting footage ready from Al Jazeera and Ramattan so that “six million” people in Italy can watch… it is for the Italian public television… I wish someone in the Arab world would do that… other than the existing news agencies here… I cannot believe that people still watch Al Arabiya. Which many of us call Al ‘Ibriyya (ie: taking the Israeli side)… they watch it now, at these times… shame on you Al Arabiya, and also, shame on Al Saud who did not allow Saudi citizens to demonstrate in KSA… those are the allies of Israel and the US… those totalitarian governments in the ME… shame on you! Shame! Those need shoes to be thrown against…
Someone calls me to tell me they want to publish my article… they say they shall give me money… money from the tragedy of the people? That is why when I came here, I came and said I have nothing to do with journalists and journalism… please send your money to the right places, into civil society organizations that support boycotting of Israeli products… send your money to the PCHR: Palestinian Centre for Human Rights… I do not want to tell you where to send your money… you do not even need to do that… what is more important is your activism… your voice, break silence, demonstrate… vote! And please do not make it about color, race, gender… pleas make it about morality and justice… and of course, foreign policy… Obama of course, has defied all that in his “change”… he, I was told, was very concerned on the casualties on “both sides” on the first few days of the attacks… that is real “change”… I mean, after all, one could say that he did show concern… Haidar and I, again, talk about the importance of boycotting movements… about the role of the citizen and that of government…
I call my friend, Ayoub Othmen, a professor of English Lit. at Al Azhar… I am relieved to hear is voice… he tells me to send all the articles to him… he believes in me, he said… I don’t believe in anything but justice for all that is happening I say… he tells me that I have turned into a nagging pain in the b*** now, I say I am fine with it…
Vittorio tells me that to list anything I want in order to get from Cyprus as our ship is coming… for the sake of wanting it to arrive, I tell him a list… mostly of biscuits for Abdel Aziz… and Halloumi from Cyprus… that was crucial…
I want them to come (they do not make it, four Israeli gun boats surround them and demand they return to Cyprus)
Natalie Abou Shakra
International Solidarity Movement
Gaza, Palestine
Natalie Abou Shakra: I cannot escape the scenes...
Saturday January 10, 2009
It is as if I cannot escape…
I spent the night at the apartment near the sea… it is as close to the sea as one can get… and it is quite frightening because of the gunboats scattered across the coast… I sit listening to the waves of a forlorn coast… I thought of Issam…
Issam’s nephew, brother and niece are in Al Shifa after they were targeted by the Israeli weaponry during the Al Fakkhoura massacre. Issam told me the family house was right across from Al Fakhoura school that is part of the UNRWA schools in the Gaza Strip. Two F16 rockets targeted the school, with less than three minutes between both. Issam’s brother, 43, was slaughtered into pieces along with his brother’s wife, and the brother’s son’s wife. His nephews Mohammad, 16, Mustafa, 14, his niece Acile, 10… and 3 year old Nour. Nour was Issam’s favorite niece. “She used to sit on my lap every time I visited. She insisted I give her five shekels (the Israeli currency) to buy chocolate. She was very naughty, he said… his tears fell, his voice shivered… his gaze fell to the floor… Ziad and Hussein looked at me… I looked away… I hugged Youssef… I am ashamed to say, it was all I could do… as well as write, write, write…
My father called me… for the first time I spoke to him since I came here… he cried… “tell me you’re okay! Tell me you love me! why did you go?!” he demanded of me… I remained silent against his distant prescence… unlike my grandparents who now have accepted reality, and who constantly tell me “May God prolong your life” (Allah yttwwil bi ‘omrek) something said to old people… now, the table have turned, I joke with grandma, now you tell me this, not me to you… telling me she was proud of me… was crucial to my survival, now…
Later on, Vittorio spoke to me about his life… it is at times like these when people ask questions and give answers that are nowhere near “normality”… I have always despised normality…
I came into Ramattan (The media center) after I had met Youssef, and when I arrived…Comrade Ewa was there, on the 9th floor, where Ramattan offices are located… I saw Ewa, I didn’t even stop, I just ran to the adjacent room which was a kitchenette… she knew, and she followed… she knew that there were tears to flow… I saw her, I let some out… she as well… we hugged… it was only seconds before we stopped and went back to “work”… to “act”… to “act” not with tears… I say it is time for my tears to dry… I do not want to have tears or the ability to shed them any longer… many of you would disagree… “stay hiuman”, as Vittorio might say, but I choose not to, not now… just not now… maybe when this ends… when the act of it ends, but when the words and the images will never end…
Press TV correspondent Mohammad Ghareeb, was helpful in finding us an apartment to remain at in order to be close to Al Shifa hospital and to be able to write and have internet… we were more than happy, more than gratuitous… my family is in Tal el Hawa and I feel the need to be with them… but, I cannot write these words had I remained, as there is no electricity there and no internet… and there is an impossibility to get to the media agencies in case of interviews… and this is very important to us, to get the word out, the image, the pain, the agony, the truth… the untold story, the narration by the citizens who are the targets… it is time for the world to listen to a narration other than that of the Israeli narration in the news and media…
to be continued..
Natalie Abou Shakra
International Solidarity Movement
Gaza, Palestine
It is as if I cannot escape…
I spent the night at the apartment near the sea… it is as close to the sea as one can get… and it is quite frightening because of the gunboats scattered across the coast… I sit listening to the waves of a forlorn coast… I thought of Issam…
Issam’s nephew, brother and niece are in Al Shifa after they were targeted by the Israeli weaponry during the Al Fakkhoura massacre. Issam told me the family house was right across from Al Fakhoura school that is part of the UNRWA schools in the Gaza Strip. Two F16 rockets targeted the school, with less than three minutes between both. Issam’s brother, 43, was slaughtered into pieces along with his brother’s wife, and the brother’s son’s wife. His nephews Mohammad, 16, Mustafa, 14, his niece Acile, 10… and 3 year old Nour. Nour was Issam’s favorite niece. “She used to sit on my lap every time I visited. She insisted I give her five shekels (the Israeli currency) to buy chocolate. She was very naughty, he said… his tears fell, his voice shivered… his gaze fell to the floor… Ziad and Hussein looked at me… I looked away… I hugged Youssef… I am ashamed to say, it was all I could do… as well as write, write, write…
My father called me… for the first time I spoke to him since I came here… he cried… “tell me you’re okay! Tell me you love me! why did you go?!” he demanded of me… I remained silent against his distant prescence… unlike my grandparents who now have accepted reality, and who constantly tell me “May God prolong your life” (Allah yttwwil bi ‘omrek) something said to old people… now, the table have turned, I joke with grandma, now you tell me this, not me to you… telling me she was proud of me… was crucial to my survival, now…
Later on, Vittorio spoke to me about his life… it is at times like these when people ask questions and give answers that are nowhere near “normality”… I have always despised normality…
I came into Ramattan (The media center) after I had met Youssef, and when I arrived…Comrade Ewa was there, on the 9th floor, where Ramattan offices are located… I saw Ewa, I didn’t even stop, I just ran to the adjacent room which was a kitchenette… she knew, and she followed… she knew that there were tears to flow… I saw her, I let some out… she as well… we hugged… it was only seconds before we stopped and went back to “work”… to “act”… to “act” not with tears… I say it is time for my tears to dry… I do not want to have tears or the ability to shed them any longer… many of you would disagree… “stay hiuman”, as Vittorio might say, but I choose not to, not now… just not now… maybe when this ends… when the act of it ends, but when the words and the images will never end…
Press TV correspondent Mohammad Ghareeb, was helpful in finding us an apartment to remain at in order to be close to Al Shifa hospital and to be able to write and have internet… we were more than happy, more than gratuitous… my family is in Tal el Hawa and I feel the need to be with them… but, I cannot write these words had I remained, as there is no electricity there and no internet… and there is an impossibility to get to the media agencies in case of interviews… and this is very important to us, to get the word out, the image, the pain, the agony, the truth… the untold story, the narration by the citizens who are the targets… it is time for the world to listen to a narration other than that of the Israeli narration in the news and media…
to be continued..
Natalie Abou Shakra
International Solidarity Movement
Gaza, Palestine
Thursday, January 15, 2009
An e-mail from Natalie: "i am angry, sad, frustrated... this is disgusting"
E-mail from Natalie:
January 15, 2009. 8:00 p.m
...i was lucky to have a camera around, vittorio took the pics... and of course he could not resist but take pics of my head and my notebook... we are now with alberto, mohammad at ramattan... going to al shifa hospital, if possible will go to my house... no one is accepting to take me there, the ambulances do not want to go
Nader...it is disgusting... forgive me, but please do not call me today, i am far from my palestinian family, i have no idea what happened to them...
Iyad Mutawwaq's leg was photographed... can you see how the shathaya enter? and this is nothing... believe me... write that down... this is considered minor injury in front od the big ones... ones that destroy a person's life
i am trying to laugh, else i will break down...i am just now at the ramattan, they bombed extensively with their discgusting ugly tanks around us...i want to go down home... but, i cannot, no one is entering where i live... i want to go to al quds hospital... but the israelis are shooting with their snipers...
i am angry, sad, frustrated... this is disgusting
January 15, 2009. 8:00 p.m
...i was lucky to have a camera around, vittorio took the pics... and of course he could not resist but take pics of my head and my notebook... we are now with alberto, mohammad at ramattan... going to al shifa hospital, if possible will go to my house... no one is accepting to take me there, the ambulances do not want to go
Nader...it is disgusting... forgive me, but please do not call me today, i am far from my palestinian family, i have no idea what happened to them...
Iyad Mutawwaq's leg was photographed... can you see how the shathaya enter? and this is nothing... believe me... write that down... this is considered minor injury in front od the big ones... ones that destroy a person's life
i am trying to laugh, else i will break down...i am just now at the ramattan, they bombed extensively with their discgusting ugly tanks around us...i want to go down home... but, i cannot, no one is entering where i live... i want to go to al quds hospital... but the israelis are shooting with their snipers...
i am angry, sad, frustrated... this is disgusting
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